I'm Back

So what is up with this? As soon as I decide to leave Blogger, they make the site much cooler?!?! What's the deal? I will be posting at this site as well from now on. Things are just going to be a little bit different! :)

GOODBYE!

Goodbye Blogger, HELLO LIVEJOURNAL! I'm moving to livejournal TODAY!
Check me out at:
http://www.livejournal.com/users/juleskirby/
This new site allows people to leave comments! I EXPECT THEM!!! LOVE YA!

Nine Layers

LAYER ONE:
-- Name: Julie Elisabeth Kirby
-- Birth date: October 27, 1981
-- Birthplace: Houston, Texas
-- Current Location: Conroe, Texas
-- Eye Color: Hazel
-- Hair Color: Brown w/blonde hilights
-- Height: 5'6
-- Righty or Lefty: Lefty
-- Zodiac Sign: Scorpio

LAYER TWO:
-- Your heritage: English
-- The shoes you wore today: Navy flip flops w/the american flag
-- Your weakness: Charlie, Coco/Cricket, Cheese
-- Your fears: Spiders, the dark, being alone
-- Your perfect pizza: One that stays at the pizza place... I hate pizza with a passion!!!
-- Goal you'd like to achieve: Graduate college, travel the world, be a good Mom

LAYER THREE:
-- Your most overused phrase on AIM: Ahhh lol
-- Your first waking thoughts: What time is it???
-- Your best physical feature: I guess my eyes
-- Your most missed memory: Anything about my cousin, Ryan

LAYER FOUR:
-- Pepsi or Coke: Concord grape juice
-- McDonald's or Burger King: None of the above
-- Single or group dates: Since Charlie and I live together and are alone the majority of the time I prefer group dates
-- Adidas or Nike: Flip flops
-- Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton
-- Chocolate or vanilla: Cookies -n- Cream
-- Cappuccino or coffee: YUCK! neither

LAYER FIVE:
-- Smoke: Never in my life
-- Cuss: Too much. Potty mouth
-- Sing: As much as possible
-- Take a shower everyday: Yes or a bath
-- Do you think you've been in love: Totally
-- Want to go to college: I'm in college right now and I want out
-- Liked high school: Ummm... I liked my freshman-junior year
-- Want to get married: Heck yah. July 23, 2005
-- Believe in yourself: Not at all
-- Get motion sickness: All the freakin time
-- Think you're attractive: Not at all
-- Think you're a health freak: I am now. I never used to be.
-- Get along with your parent(s): Yes, they mean the world to me
-- Like thunderstorms: Hell no. They scare the crap out of me!!!
-- Play an instrument: I played the flute in High School

LAYER SIX: In the past month...
-- Drank alcohol: Oh yes
-- Smoked: Nope, and I haven't ever done it
-- Done a drug: No
-- Made Out: Oh yes ;)
-- Gone on a date: Yes
-- Gone to the mall?: No :(
-- Eaten an entire box of Oreos?: No
-- Eaten sushi: Yuck
-- Been on stage: No
-- Been dumped: Hell no
-- Gone skating: No, but that would be fun
-- Made homemade cookies: Nope
-- Gone skinny dipping: Ummmm.... no :P
-- Dyed your hair: No, but I need too
-- Stolen Anything: Charlie's heart ;)

LAYER SEVEN: Ever...
-- Played a game that required removal of clothing: No
-- If so, was it mixed company: I plead the 5th
-- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Yes
-- Been caught "doing something": Yes
-- Been called a tease: LOL yes
-- Gotten beaten up: Nope
-- Shoplifted: Yes
-- Changed who you were to fit in: Unfortunitly

LAYER EIGHT:
-- Age you hope to be married: 23/24
-- Numbers and Names of Children: 3 Children- Kammie Michelle Edinburgh, Ryan Andrew Edinburgh, #3 TBA
-- Describe your Dream Wedding: You will see on July 23, 2005
-- How do you want to die: Asleep in the bed when I am about 105
-- Where you want to go to college: I wish I went to A&M
-- What do you want to be when you grow up: Pretty
-- What country would you most like to visit: Australia, France, Italy

LAYER NINE:
-- Number of drugs taken illegally: 0
-- Number of people I could trust with my life: 10-20 maybe?
-- Number of CDs that I own: Ehhhhh 100?
-- Number of piercings: 4
-- Number of tattoos: 0
-- Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: Im sure quite a few in highschool
-- Number of scars on my body: 1 on my knee from falling in highschool
-- Number of things in my past that I regret: Ummmm...too many to count. The biggest was in my freshman year of highschool

Howdy.

Howdy. Lol. I mean we are in Texas, right? I guess its okay to use that word. Not to damn much has been going on in the life of Julie. Working out, cleaning, organizing and tv have been a huge part of my life lately. No job to be had yet. YET! YET DAMNIT! I will find a job soon, something that rocks and that I'm good at. School is over for the semester. I will be going back to SHSU hopefully next semester. I don't know if I can afford it though, which sucks. Charlie and I are great. No wedding plans as of yet. I have it all in my head, but officially, nothing. I want to plan it. I just don't want to talk to my parents about it. UGH. I'm such a baby sometimes. The $$$ situation is so hard for Charlie and I right now. We are poorer than poor and truth is we are getting deeper and deeper in the "whole" but neither of us want to ask our parents. It sucks to have to ask for money. This time we truely need it. God only knows how we will pay rent on the 3rd of May. Or the phone bill on the 10th of May or the Electric bill on the 26th of May or all our credit cards on the 17th of May. Now for good stuff. Last night, or today, however you look at it at like 2a.m. Chad G., one of Charlie's old & bestfriends, called him. He wants to start a SKA band w/Charlie and another bestfriend, Josh B., and some other people who I don't know. Practices should start in mid-May. Charlie is so excited. He has wanted to be in a band for like 3+ years now. Plus since it would be with Chad and Josh makes it even better. Those 3 were such good friends in high school, it was kinda sad to see there friendship go away. So, hopefully now they can have some good times. I know Charlie was wanting to ask both of them to be in the wedding. Anyway. Gotta go for now. Yay for possible trip to New York with Courtney!!!!

Work Out

1 Hour work out today- 20min treadmil, 20min elyptical trainer, 20min weights(mainly for upper body)...
YAY!

Quiz thingy

FIRSTS.
First best friend: Andrea Little and Jenny Christian...we were inseperable from when we were little girls until around 3rd grade when I moved away. After that the only true bestfriend I've had has been Kam.
First car: the "Beast" a teal-ish color Dodge Ramcharger... I think it was a 1990
First date: oh gosh. The rodeo parade w/a guy named Brett
First screen name: jkirby00
First self purchased album: ummm I think probobaly NSYNC
First funeral: ummm, my grandpa Tom
First pets: Mollie my perfect golden retriever. I loved her so much. She was such a part of our family and when she died itwas horrible. She lived to be like 17 years old. WOW!
First piercing/tattoo: ears
First credit card: probobaly a gas credit card that my parents gave me.
First true love: first & last- Charlie
First enemy: no clue...
First musician you remember hearing in your house: Rafee

LASTS.
Last cigarette: never had one in my whole life
Last kiss: this morning when Charlie left
Last good cry: ummm when my uncle died.
Last library book checked out: its been years
Last movie seen: at home: friends season 7
Last beverage drank: white grape juice
Last food consumed: strawberry jello w/bananas in it
Last phone call: ummm my brother just called me
Last time showered: this morning
Last shoes worn: black flip flops w/rinestones on them
Last cd played: Blink 182
Last item bought: ring cleaner from the Bridal Symposium when I went w/Kam
Last annoyance: oh gosh. ummm bills?
Last disappointment: school
Last time wanting to die: I don't know if I've ever wanted to die. Though when my little cousin Ryan was in the hospitol fighting for his life and eventually lost it I would have taken his place in a heartbeat.
Last time scolded: its been a while
Last shirt worn: the one I have on now. a SHSU t-shirt
Last website visited: yahoo.com to check my e-mail
Last word you said: okay bye bye
Last song you sang: Jessica Simpson- With You

FUTURE.
Where do you want to live?: well thats a hard one. either Montgomery(April Sound), The Woodlands or another state.
What is your career going to be?: something in finance
Where are you going to live?: a big house on the water
How many kids do you want?: 3 or 4

CURRENTS.
Current mood: ehhh. i don't feel well, so not so good
Current music: none
Current taste: white grape juice
Current smell: nothing... maybe kitty food?
Current hair: pilled on top of my head...
Current clothes: SHSU t-shirt, comfy cotton capri pants
Current annoyance: $$MONEY$$
Current longing: for Charlie to come home
Current desktop picture: well we have webshots so it changes every few minutes, but right now it's a picture of Lance Bass
Current favorite artist: currently it would be Jessica Simpson.
Current book: ahh I just read "Can You Keep a Secret" it was soooo good. It's by the woman who wrote the Shopoholic series of books!!! I couldn't put it down!
Current color of toenails: Pink
Current time-wasting wish: this
Current hate: being poor

WHATS.
What is in your cd player?: Blink 182
What color socks are you wearing?: not wearing any. i hate socks!!!
What Color of underwear are you wearing: umm see above, but replace socks w/underware. ;) j/k they are pink w/rinestones on them
What's under your bed?: my kitty Cricket. he's taking a nap!
What time did you wake up today?: 11:45am?

Well well well. I think I am about to move my blog to Live Journal. It bothers me not knowing who reads this. I absolutly love writing in here, but I want to be more open without worrying about hurting somone that may read this. I will let everyone know when I switch so that if you want to keep reading my stuff you can! But if I don't allow you to read my journal I will also have a "less private" journal through my webpage that any one can read! SEE YA!

Survey type thingy...

1: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says:
Is it bad that there is not 1 single book close to me or in the same room as me?!?!?!
2: Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?
A lottery ticket that Charlie & I bought last weekend... no we didn't win :(
3: What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Friends... :)
4: WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what the time is:
7:25pm?!?!?
5: Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?
7:05pm
6: With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?:
Charlie drumming on something... like he always does...
7: When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Ummmm earlier... when Charlie left I stepped out and gave him a kiss goodbye.
8: Before you came to this website, what did you look at?
Courtknee's blog.
9:What are you wearing?
Navy confy pants and a light blue shirt.
10: Did you dream last night? What about?
Nothing that I can remember???
11: When did you last laugh?
When Coco(my cat) jumped on the big confy chair in the living room... he is so cute!
12: What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Well, we haven't decorated this room yet, so the only thing on the wall is a picture thingy that has tons of pictures on it. The ones that stand out are: Kam & Jake, Brady, Nolan, Amie & Allie, Troy & Tyler, Chad, Mollie, My parents, Tiffany, Amy's Parents...
13: Seen anything weird lately?
Coco & Cricket are weird every day!
14: What do you think of this quiz?:
Takes up time!
15: What is the last film you saw?
Something's Gotta Give... I bought it and its really good!
16: If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?
Plane tickets. Kam, Jake, Charlie & I would be on the first flight out of here to Disney World!!!
17: Tell me something about you that I don't know.
I'm ready to get married. I don't want to wait a year. I'm ready now.
18: If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
I would make it so that there is a cure for everything: ie... Cancer, head injurys(those are the ones that have been very personal to me), aids, ext.
19: Do you like to dance?
Heck yah! Just not in public.
20: George Bush:
I think he's been an awesome President. I voted for him in 2000 and will vote for him in 2004.
21: Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Kammie Lynn Edinburgh.
22: Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Ryan Kirby Edinburgh.
23: Would you ever consider living abroad?
Yes, if I were rich I would deffinitly consider living in Italy or Australia.

Loss, Gain, Move, Job

Well, it's been a while, so I will start off with some major updates. Lets get the bad stuff out of the way. My uncle Howard died on March 18 due to cancer. The cancer just totally ate him up. We all knew it was coming but it still hurts just as hard. The only thing that helps is that we now know that my cousin, Ryan, has someone in heavan with him. I know Howard will take good care of Ryan! The other bad thing that has happened is that I lost my job on March 26. My boss hated me and just wanted a reason to get rid of me. Looks like it worked. But I can proudly say that I worked hard at Woodforest and I did nothing that warented me losing my job. So, I'm fighting it and I have a lot of awesome people on my side!!! In some unrelated, exciting news, Charlie and I just moved into our *OWN* apartment. Its very nice and we have lots of room for our things. We got new couches and its just great. I will really miss living with KAM! Good thing that her and Jake live maybe 1/8 of a mile away(same apartment complex). Due to all the moving I found these old letters from like 9th grade from Kam, Chad, Kristen and some other people. They were really funny. The funniest part was that in each letter I put that I was soooo in love with someone. And each letter it was SOMEONE DIFFERENT. The guys ranged from Buck, Brian, Dale, Daniel, Chad(though he was a constant through most of that year), Jake, Criag, Ben and so many more. I was so boy crazy!!! Anyway, I better go I have a lot of unpacking to do! Talk to you soon. I hope.

2 & 1/2 Months

It's been 2 & 1/2 months since my little cousin, Ryan, died. I wish I could tell you all that things are going better for myself and my family. But, truthfully, they aren't. We all miss him so much. Every day goes by and for me it doesn't get easier. It gets harder. Harder to deal with the fact that he didn't have a good New Years, or get a bunch of cards and candy for Valentines day. I wonder everyday if he knew how much we all loved him? If he knew how hard we were all fighting for him... for his life. I hope he knows that he will be in my heart every day for as long as I live. And that when I get to Heaven... one of the first things I want to do is to hug him and to tell him I love him. I am in pain for my Aunt, Uncle and cousins. I know if it hurts me this bad, I can't imagine what they are going through. I just hope that everyone I love... knows I love them. ;)

**CHANGE OF SUBJECT**

I am officially Kam's Maid of Honor. Her and Jake are planning a Feburary 12, 2005 wedding. I'm very happy for them. We are going to go the Bridal Extravaganza in July. Charlie and I are planning a September 3, 2005 wedding. The date will probobaly change a million times, but I know it will be in 2005. ;). My Maid of Honor will be Kam and my bridesmaids will be my cousin- Jessica, sister-in-law- Rene, future sister-in-law- Tiffany and my junior bridesmaids will be my cousins- Sarah, Allie and Amie. Anyway. I need to go. I have the day off tomorrow. I am so excited about that!

Cry

"CRY" by Faith Hill

If I had just one tear running down your cheek
Maybe I could cope maybe I'd get some sleep
If I had just one moment at your expense
Maybe all my misery would be well spent

Yeah.... Could you cry a little
Lie just a little
Pretend that you're feeling a little more pain
I gave now I 'm wanting
Something in return
So cry just a little for me

If your love could be caged, honey I would hold the key
And conceal it underneath the pile of lies you handed me
And you'd hunt those lies
They'd be all you'd ever find
And that'd be all you'd have to know
For me to be fine

Yeah.... And you'd cry a little
Die just a little
and baby I would feel just a little less pain
I gave now I'm wanting
Something in return
So cry just a little for me

Give it up baby
I hear your goodbye
Nothins goin save me
I can see it it your eyes
Some kind of heartache
Darlin give it a try
I dont want pity
I just want what is mine

Yeah... Could you cry a little
Lie just a little
Pretend that your're feeling a little more pain
I gave now I'm wanting
Something in retrun
So cry just a little for me

Yeah... Cry just a little for me

woo ooo, could you cry a little for me

yeah, yeah

f-in f-in

ugh i can't take the f-in(te he he) silence. arghhhh

ARGH!!!

I just feel like screaming. I don't think that any understands how I am feeling. Charlie is making jokes about everything, Kam told me to stop being a gay wad and Jake said "what up?" I mean I know this may seem total drama queen to some of you. But my emotions are very elevated right now, and the last thing I want to hear is Charlie making some dumb joke or something like that. I dunno. I dunno. I dunno. I am actually looking forward to work tomorrow to get away from this apartment.

Kam

I don't want people to think I am not happy for Kam... because deep down I am. I am happy she got what she has wanted for a long time. I hope this fufills all of her dreams.

Kam & Jake

Kam and Jake are engaged. Isn't that just slap you in the face and spit on ya FANTASTIC! I'm not trying to be a bitch, I'm really not. But this is the last thing I need to try to deal with in my life right now. I feel so hurt and just mad. It was so important to me for Kam to be there when Charlie proposed. And then Jake goes and does it and I have no clue and am no where to be seen. Friendship isn't what it seems ladies and gentlemen. I understand if he wanted it to be private, but I don't think that is what it was about. Did you ever see the friends episode where they talk about being "Fazed out?" Well, that's what I feel like. Slowly but surely I won't be friends with Kam. We will no longer be roommates in March and that will be the beginning of the end. I can imagine seeing her somewhere 10-15 years from now and I'll be with Charlie, and my children. And being the polite people we are Kam and I will say "hi," it'll be awkward and we'll go our separate ways. When she leaves, the kids will ask "Mommy who was that" and all I will be able to say is one of the best friends I ever had. The kids won't understand and either will I. Something has just changed in our friendship. Whether its me, her or a little of both I don't know. In my eyes this happens every time Kam becomes close to a guy she is dating. I can start from the beginning with Craig... Her first long term, "I love you" boyfriend. When they first started dating Kam and I were close... Then the further their relationship went along the more distant our friendship was. She became friends with his friends and though we were not enemies... I wouldn't call us friends. Then Craig broke her heart. We were best friends again. As far as I can remember during high school I don't think she was "serious" with anyone else. But, when she was with Chris A. we weren't close either... and I think that was during our Senior year. When they broke up or whatever you want to call it we were close again. Hell, we were even going to be roommates our freshman year in college at SHSU. That didn't work out she decided she wanted to be roommates with Diana H. It hurt me so bad... But I won't go there. As soon as our freshman year started Kam started dating Ryan, a Nick Carter Backstreet boy look-alike. During that time Kam and I were about as distant as you could be. I don't think we talked for like the whole semester. She made new friends... Dancers, like her. Michelle, Jen and some others. They became her "best friends." When she broke up with Ryan or Ryan broke up with her(however you want to look at it) I was there again. We again, talked about being roommates, in an apartment... We were really close. That didn't fly. Kam moved in with Michelle. I think that they started partying a lot with different fraternities. That's when Kam met Chris Y. There is so much to say about him, but I won't go there. Chris' friends were friends with Michelle and Jen and all that so it worked out perfectly. I didn't meet Chris for a long time. I saw him one day when Kam and I were walking back from a class and she didn't introduce me or anything... She just said "bye." Kam moved in with Chris a few months after they started dating... I finally met him(though I wasn't impressed) and I saw Kam seldom. She hung out with Chris' friends. The party, fraternity type of people and their girlfriends. I saw Kam during the times when she and Chris were having problems. I would be there when he did something mean to her, or she wanted to move out. The next day she would be back with him and I was out of the picture. Kam finally broke up with Chris, or he broke up with her, in January of 2003. Kam and I became close again for a very short time. She started hanging out with Amanda R. and going out with her a lot. Amanda introduced her to Jake and they became serious very fast. Kam had it with living with her parents and wanted to get an apartment. I truthfully believe I was her last choice and we moved in to an apartment in the end of March of 2003. The day we moved in was the day I met Jake(they had been dating a month or so +). Kam and I did a lot together since we lived together. I thought Jake was a great guy. Kam started going out with Jake and his friends the majority of the time. Charlie and I went out with them twice. It was fun, but you could tell Charlie and I didn't fit in. The four of us went on a trip in July of 2003 and it was fun but there was also something weird about it. Kam and Jake wanted to be "ALONE" a lot and didn't really want to go to bars/clubs or anything like that. Charlie proposed on this trip. It was awesome. Kam and I have drifted a part ever since. She has started hanging out with Mark and Amanda (mark is jakes best friend) and really not having anything to do with Charlie and I. Kam and I still pretend we are best friends. I get my feelings hurt a lot... but I know deep down that even saying Kam and I are friends might be a strech. Though I don't think Kam would ever say it or admit it I believe it all comes down to one thing. Kam is beautiful, skinny, perky and every guys dream. She is probably the most beautiful person I know or have ever seen. When you look at me you see the opposite of all of that. I am on a good day slightly cute(in a about as pretty as a fat girl can be way), fat, and every guys friend or someone they make fun of. If you didn't know Kam and I... I don't think anyone would think we were friends. And maybe she doesn't do it consciously, but I know Kam doesn't want to be seen with me at a club, restaurant or in beautiful people party city, Las Vegas. I can't say I blame her. But it just hurts. Between the stress and pain of losing my Cousin, Ryan, the stress of work, the stress of school & not knowing when I am graduating, and all of this, I have to think that God is trying to break me. But when I get to the point of being broken, I know that when I build myself back up I will be a better person. Wow, this was long...but its been coming for a long time. I'm sure the next few days will be filled with drama, so I will be writing more.

Thoughts

Have you ever felt alone when you are around someone??? I have the past few months(two or so). And no, for all of you suspecting that I am talking about Charlie, I'm not. I'm talking about my roomate/friend/Kam. Something is different between us. I dunno what, but there is something. I wish I knew what it is, and I wish I could fix it. Im just afraid that we will move out of this apartment in March and go our seperate ways and not speak anymore. If that happens I dunno what I will do. On a new subject... I have been talking to my two cousins(Jessica and Sarah) a lot lately, which is so awesome to me. They are two of the most awesome girls in the world. They have such big hearts and they are both very beautiful, inside and out. Sarah has also developed a strong liking for Charlie. They talk all the time and its very cute!!! Sarah is 12 and Jessica is 15. They have grown up so fast and I hope to see them much much more in the days/weeks/months/years to come. It just makes my heart happy and somewhat takes away the pain of losing Ryan(my cousin, there brother). I have the most awesome family. I am so thankful for each person. And my family is the biggest part of my life. Most people my age don't really realize this, but I have and I am so thankful for learning this sooner than later. And just so you know when I say family I am including Charlie. We may not be married, but I don't need a peice of paper to tell me how much I love him and that he is a part of my family. We will get married one day, but right now we're not ready. I don't want to be a married woman and still be dependent on my parents or Charlie's for one single thing. Right now they(our respective parents) pay our insurance, and I know that may seem small to some people, but to me its huge. I see getting married as a very adult thing, and if I'm going to take that step then I want to be an adult. I want to be able to pay my own bills and buy a house and car/truck/suv(WHATEVER) and all that. So, yeah. I know some people may disagree. But, I'm not judging you so don't judge me! Anyway. Im happy, Charlie's happy and we're enjoying living our life. Some people may think we're living it in "SIN" since we live together. But its what is right for us and it makes me a happy girl. Anyway. This was in no way directed to anyone in perticular, so don't get upset/mad or whatever at me. We love you. Yes we do... so please don't say that we don't.
And Kam... I am so sorry for not wishing you a happy birthday. I deffinitly do hope you had a great one and have many more to come. No matter what happens with our friendship you will always hold a big place in my heart. You are a great person and I hope that we can continue to be friends if not best friends. Thank you for all of your support and friendship throughout the past years.


*ryan- i miss you sweetie. ;)

Year End Survey

A little survey about the past year...


1. What did you do in 2003 that you'd never done before?
go to Las Vegas on an awesome trip with Charlie and some friends.

2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I didn't make any last year... and I will probobaly not make any this year, I don't see the point. If you're going to do something then just friggin do it!

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
nope. thank goodnes! that would have been a big surprise!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes, my cousin- Ryan Andrew Kirby(13).

5. What countries did you visit?
just the great one we live in...

6. What would you like to have in 2004 that you lacked in 2003?
$$$ MONEY $$$

7. What date(s) from 2003 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
July 21--- When Charlie proposed. December 6--- when Ryan died.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Work. I've moved up...I think???

9. What was your biggest failure?
SCHOOL--- I have got to get my crap together.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No--- thank the Lord, but many close to me did and that is even worse.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
ummm I dunno. I didn't buy much besides the normal stuff, but Charlie bought the best thing in the world--- MY ENGAGEMENT RING!!!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My Aunt(Cherylnne), Uncle(Gary) and Cousins(Sarah and Jessica) for being so strong when everything happened with Ryan.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My brother--- on Christmas Eve

14. Where did most of your money go?
BILLS, RENT, Christmas Gifts.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Las Vegas--- getting engaged.

16. What song will always remind you of 2003?
none, really.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? sadder. miss you ryan
ii. thinner or fatter? thinner(but thats not saying much)
iii. richer or poorer? poorer

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
spending time with Ryan before he passed away.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
ummmm procrastinating!

20. How did you spend Christmas?
With family.

21. I dunno where this one went????

22. Did you fall in love in 2003?
I didn't fall in love. I fell in love in 1998 and it gets stronger every day!

23. How many one-night stands?
0, zip, nada

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Friends

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Hate is a strong word, but dislike would work.

26. What was the best book you read?
Dunno

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
ummm I dunno.

28. What did you want and get?
AN ENGAGEMENT RING!!! YAY!

29. What did you want and not get?
a new car!

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Finding Nemo?

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 22 and I went out to dinner with Kam and Jake.

32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Charlie... getting engaged, getting a vacation.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2003?
comfortable!

34. What kept you sane?
Charlie, Coco and Cricket!

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Lance Bass of course!

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
people against war.

37. Who did you miss?
no comment.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Coco and Cricket--- my kitties!

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2003.
realize who is really important to you!

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"You wouldn't even recognize me any more... not that you knew me back then"

New Year

Well Christmas was good. Not great, but I won't go into details. Since it is a new year, I will reflect on last year... 2003 held the best and worst moments of my life. The best was that Charlie and I became engaged. He proposed on July 21, 2003 at 10:30pm on a romantic gondola ride at the Venetian Hotel & Casino in Las Vegas, NV. It was perfect and what I have wanted for a long time. The worst is that I have lost a peice of my heart. My cousin, Ryan Andrew Kirby, died on December 6, 2003 due to brain injurys. As bad as it is this overshadows everything that has happened in my life. Ryan was only 13 and had a heart of gold. With all the evil people in this world to think that my cousin, rather than all of them, had to die makes me sick. He will be forever missed and always in our hearts. Ryan was going to be one of Charlie's junior-groomsmen in our wedding. We will deffinitly do something special for Ryan and all the others that we have lost at our wedding. Besides those two things there have been some other positive and negative things that happened in 2003 for me. The positives are: I have moved up in my job and have really started to make it a career, I am watching my nephew- Nolan- grow up in front of my eyes... its awesome and he's awesome, Charlie and I grow closer every day, I went on vacation with charlie, gaining friendships--- and so many more things. The negatives are: my uncle- Howard, my dads brother- got diagnosed with severe cancer and he is fighting for his life, school, losing friendships(one of the most important ones), financial matters(UGH) and more. So, with all of that said, I would have to say that 2003 was a rough year and though I had one of the greatest moments in my life , I also had the worst and it over shadows everything. I hope next year is a great one for my family. With Ryan in heaven watching over us, we have two great men on our side... God and Ryan. I hope you all had a great year and an even better one to come.

Christmas

Someone asked me a few days ago at work what I wanted for Christmas. Nothing came out. I don't care. I just want Ryan back... and as much as I know it won't happen, my heart won't let it go.

Sarah B.

Last Monday at school my cousin, Sarah(12) was in a class when someone for some reason started talking about someone who had a head injury and died(like my cousin and her brother)(maybe it was in a book or something, I dunno, but its not the point). Well, Sarah totally freaked out. She was sobbing and had to go to the counselor. Its stuff like this that just makes my heart break in a million pieces. Sarah didn't go back to school that day. I know she will be okay... but I just don't know when all the pain from Ryan's death will go away. I keep trying to tell myself that he's in a better place with no pain, but then the other part of me can't deal with it. So most of the time I try not to think about it. But I do think of him constantly. Memories run through my head all day and all night. So yeah, I gotta stop talking about it now. I love you Ryan. Miss you babe.

Ryan

Here are some links that pertain to my cousin:
Obituary and Guestbook

Spring-Klein Baseball Webpage, with a page/guestbook dedicated to Ryan

My webpage, that currently, is just for him.

I AM: a 22-year old woman, with a great family and someone wonderful to love.
I WANT: my cousin to be alive.
I HAVE: the best family in the world.
I WISH:I could take all the pain away from my family, due to my cousins death.
I HATE: that the people I love the most are in so much pain.
I MISS: Ryan Andrew Kirby.
I FEAR:losing someone else in my family.
I HEAR:the dishwasher.
I SMELL:ummm nothing?
I SEARCH:for money.
I WONDER: when Charlie and I will get married.
I REGRET: not telling Ryan how much I love him.
I LOVE:my family, friends, Charlie and my kitties(COCO Y CRICKET).
I ALWAYS:try to do the right thing.
I AM NOT:an emotionally strong person.
I DANCE:in my car or at the computer!
I SING: all the time...in front of my computer, in the car, etc.
I CRY:every day, for the past 2-3 weeks.
I WRITE:as much as I can.
I WIN: at... ummmm I dunno.
I LOSE: Time.
I CONFUSE: myself... Charlie?
I NEED:Ryan.
I SHOULD: try to be strong.

Sunday five

***Sunday Five***
1. Do you enjoy the cold weather and snow for the holidays? Yes, I love it so much. I really wish we had snow, that would be sooooo awesome!!!
2. What is your ideal holiday celebration? My whole family together at a ski resort... that would be awesome. Maybe one day it will happen. ;)
3. Do you do have any holiday traditions? Not really. Our whole family just gets together for Christmas Eve though.
4. Do you do anything to help the needy? Not as much as I should.
5. What one gift would you like for yourself? A new SUV... but in reality I just want gift certs to La-Z-Boy

Ryan, I love you. I don't know if I ever told you that. But I do. You didn't deserve what happened and we prayed for you so much. I wish I could have taken your place. I'm not sure if things will ever be the same without you. I really hope you were never in pain. You will always be in my heart...

I love you, Ryan

Well, my cousin died last night in the middle of the night. I've never hurt so bad in my life... and I'm not sure when the pain will stop. His parents(my aunt and uncle) decided to donate his organs... they said that over 70 people will live because of that. Maybe I am just selfish, but, right now I don't care if those people live I just want my cousin back. Thats all. I've never hurt this bad in my whole life. I don't understand why God would let a young healthy boy die. Its just not right. I don't know when the tears will stop. I don't know when all of the conversations that have gone on for the past week or so will leave my mind. I keep thinking that this has to be a dream... I just wish someone would wake me up.

Survey

First kiss: Alex Linder in Kindergarden. We kissed a lot... ha ha
First real kiss: Jim Bankert in 8th grade.
First job: Hastings, as a cashier. that sucked
First screen name: jkirby00 <-- so boring.
First self purchased album: goodness... i have no clue?
First funeral: ummm my grandfather, tom(my mom's dad) but I was too young to remember
First pets: Callie- a calico cat, and Mollie- a golden retriever
First piercing: My ears when I was like 10 or so?
First true love: Charlie.
First big trip: Disney World, with Dad, Amy and Matt
First musician you remember hearing in your house: Raffie
Last big car ride: ummm when we drove to Illinois a few years ago.
Last kiss: last night
Last good cry: every day for the past week. read past entries
Last movie seen: Elf. too cute
Last beverage drunk: water, last night
Last food consumed: a muffin
Last phone call: Amy, to see when we are going to the hospital
Last TV show watched: Live with Regis and Kelly
Last shoes worn: my stars and stripes flip flops
Last CD played: Blink 182 (self titled)
Last item bought: breakfast at the Hospital yesterday
Last soda drunk: a coke i had with dinner
Last ice cream eaten: a week or so ago
Last shirt worn: im wearing a shsu shirt now


*okay i had to do this to get my mind off of ryan, now we are going to the hospital.

Ryan

Well, as ironic as it can get. About 15 minutes after I finished writing in my blog my mom called and said that the Dr.'s weren't giving my cousin until the end of the night. So, I got up and Charlie and I went to the hospitol(Memorial Herman in Houston) and were there until about 11 this morning. With no sleep. Ryan pulled it through the night. He is doing "somewhat" better. I've never prayed harder for anything in my life. I'm off of work tomorrow night also, so I am sure I will be at the hospitol all day. Please pray for Ryan and my family. And if you don't belive in prayer, do what ever it is you do.

Investments

Have you ever thought you made a bad investment? Im not talking finance, banking, stocks, bonds... ext. Im talking about investing your heart, your time, your energy. I would say that right now I currently have 4 huge investments. 1) Charlie. 2) My family. 3)A small number of close friends. 4)My job. I can safely tell you that Charlie and I, and our "investment" is awesome. I love him so much and he loves me so much. We are so happy right now. My favorite thing in the world is waking up and seeing him there. I can also tell you that I don't regret the time and love I give my family. They are my world. My investment in them right now is a little shakey. If I lose my cousin, I just feel like the investment might fall apart. I need my cousin. I need him to live and to show me that things will be okay. I need to go watch him play college baseball at UT in about 5 years. See him hit the homerun that wins the game. I want that for him. I want him to wake up. I want to stop hearing "Jujie(what my parents call me), Ryan had a bad night." I really don't know how many more nights I can hear that. I love my family and Charlie, more than anything they are my world. My third "investment" is drifting away, very slowly... but dramatically. I won't go into that in any more detail because I think some things are privite. That person or persons just needs to know that I will treasure every memory, all the laughter and the tears. I hope that in the end though that investment may wobble and shake at times that it will be victorious and last for the rest of our lives. My fourth investment is work. I hope to God that I make the right decisions reguarding it and my priorities.
So, anyway. I hope this wasn't too cheesey for yall. But it was from the heart. I don't really even know who reads this, besides me and Courtney and Charlie but yah. Goodnite. I love my Charlie, my Co~Co, and my Cricket!!!

"Having one good friend could change your life."
Things have been so messed up and confusing lately. Between work, friends and family I feel like Im going in circles. With work its just confusion, nothing horrible or anything at all. Friends... I don't know where to begin. I guess its just that things becamse crystal clear Monday night and it hurts. And with family, my cousin is in a hospitol bed fighting for his life. Everything else just goes away when I think about him. He's only 13 and he's in a coma. I just can't fathom why things like this happen. For those of you who may be a bit confused, I will give you the quick run-down. Ryan, my 13 year old cousin, was at my grandpas house in Galveston putting up the 4-wheeler and he flipped it and fractured his skull, his brain is swelling and he is in a coma at Memorial Herman Hospital in Houston. If we lose him I don't know what I will do. I pray for him daily... its just very hard for me. WHEN he gets better I will go see him... but for now my whole family agrees that it would be better if I didn't go see him because I would probobaly freak out. So, if you have a prayer in you... please pray for him. His name is Ryan Kirby and he is 13. Anyway. I don't really want to post anything else right now. I hope everyone is doing well.

after searching myself and all of that stuff i finially know what my idenity is to myself and everyone i know.
"DUFF." And if you say its not true your only lying to yourself, not to me. Peace Out.

Monday Five

1. Do you like to shop? Why or why not? Oh yes I do. It is one of my favorite things in the whole world.

2. What was the last thing you purchased? Pink Christmas decorations for the apartment

3. Do you prefer shopping online or at an actual store? Why? an actual store. Shopping online isn't for me.

4. Did you get an allowance as a child? How much was it? No, I just got what I wanted and stuff(that sounds real bad... but I really wasn't spoiled)

5. What was the last thing you regret purchasing? A Charm off of EBAY because its been 3 weeks and I haven't gotten it yet. ugh

Scrooge:: Christmas
Ribbon:: Pink
Physical:: doctor
Income:: yes please
Dream:: romance
Notebook:: Nicholas Sparks
Disney:: World
Combo:: dancer
Booty:: Call
Skin:: -imax

la la la

Monday Five

1. List five things you'd like to accomplish by the end of the year.
Well, the year is almost over but I guess... Register for the Spring Semester, have a great Christmas, get some new clothes, be more successful at my job, save some money.

2. List five people you've lost contact with that you'd like to hear from again.
Chad Gowan, Daniel Stevens... those two are really it.

3. List five things you'd like to learn how to do.
Study, graduate college, makes lots of money, be a better person, get free stuff?

4. List five things you'd do if you won the lottery (no limit).
Go on vacation with Charlie- Kam and Jake, buy a house, buy new cars for me and my family and Kam and Jake, pay off my parents house(and any remodeling), go on a shopping spree with Kam.

5. List five things you do that help you relax.
Baths, listening to music, lying in bed watching movies, playing with Coco and Cricket, getting pedicures

Your Heart is Red


What Color is Your Heart?
brought to you by Quizilla

hug from behind - you like to feel what the other
person is feeling and see things how they see
them. you tend to be serious and emotional.


What Sign of Affection Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Your: Happy eyes! Your cheerfull, bright and always
want to try something new. Your inquisitive and
quite lovable. You have many friends and will
succseed in life.


What type of eyes do you have?
brought to you by Quizilla

Lion King!


What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

Your soul is bound to the Yellow Rose: The
Gentle.

"I've travelled through the land of
surrender and seen it all. I throw my heart
out and keep my head up, and now I travel
through the land of peace."

The Yellow Rose is associated with friendship,
intuition, and fun. It is governed by the
goddess Hestia and its sign is The Intertwined
Rings, or True Friendship.

As a Yellow Rose, you always look out for your
friends. You would much rather have strong
ties with friends than a single tie with a
lover and your devotion to your friends is
clear. You may have great intuition and be
able to read emotions clearly, but sometimes
you can seem distant yourself.


What Rose Is Your Soul Bound To?
brought to you by Quizilla

Romantic movie! You probably won't star in a porno
anytime soon. You seem to be really into the
whole "love" thing...romantic sex
with perfumed sheets and candles all over the
place. You're probably a hopeless romantic. You
value sex and respect your partner too much to
do anything like porn. AWWWWWW! <3


What kind of porno would you star in?
brought to you by Quizilla

I ment to update after my birthday, but I totally forgot about it. My day got much better. At work I got two deliveries of flowers(from Charlie and my Dad... awww) and a big thing of balloons. The people from the branch I am at got me a cake... and when I got home- Kam, Jake, Charlie and I went out to dinner and had a very nice time. Then, unfortunitly, I was sick Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday so I was home from work. Then Friday(Halloween) we dressed up at work and I was Thumper from Bambi. I was a very cute Bunny! That night we went out on the Southern Empress with Kam and Jake. It was a lot of fun. We danced the night away. Ha ha. So yeah, in the end I had a very nice birthday. Sorry for griping... but I was upset! Have a great day, I will as soon as I get off from work.

Well, today is my 22nd birthday. And, not to be a brat, but I have to say that this is the most depressing birthday I've ever had. Last year it was a big deal because I was 21 and all of the previous years I guess I've still been "young" and all my family and friends made a big deal out of it. Normally at the bank everyone makes a huge deal out of your birthday...decorating your desk, buying a cake, getting balloons, you get presents and they buy your lunch. But unfortunitly for my birthday I am at a different branch, and no one here even knows and if they did, I doubt they would care. Charlie got my breakfast tacos this morning and told me he loved me. Amy(my stepmom) instant messaged me on my phone and said Happy Birthday! And my manager from the loop, Melinda sent me a Happy Birthday email. I guess I shouldn't be such a brat. The day isn't over yet, so maybe it will get better! Atleast I hope it will....

The ABC's Of Me
A - Act your age - Not really. I think I act more mature than the average 22 year old. Im totally ready to get on with my career and spend the rest of my life with my buca!
B - Boyfriend - None. I do have one hell of a fiance' though!
C - Chore you hate - Ha ha ha... all of them!
D - Dad's name - David Lynn Kirby
E - Essential make up item - Eyeshadow
F - Favorite actress - Julia Roberts, J to the Lo
G - Gold or silver - Platinum!
H - Hometown - Montgomery, Texas
I - Instruments you play - I used to play the flute, but I don't know if I still can?
J - Job title - Woodforest National Bank P.B/tell
K - Kids - Just my Coco y Cricket
L - Living arrangements - Renting a 2 bed/2 bath w/Kami in Croe, Texas
M - Mom's name - Amy Marie Kirby
N - Number of people you've slept with- I don't have that many figers and toes. ;) JK
O - Overnight hospital stays - 1. Birth.
P - Phobia - Losing Charlie, my family and my bestfriend.
Q - Quote you like - "Immerse your soul in love."
R - Religious affiliation - Christian who does love and totally belive in God, but does not go to church or anything like that.
S - Siblings - 1 brother, Matthew David Kirby. 1 sister in law, Rene', Matt's wife.
T - Time you wake up - M-F: 6:30a S-S: 12p
U - Unique habit - I hum when I'm bored.
V - Vegetable you refuse to eat - Celery... it makes me PUKE and Kam always has it here... ugh
W - Worst habit- Singing, taking things to personal
X - X-rays you've had - Dentist, ultra sound(NO, NOT B/C I was pregnant or anyone thought I was).
Y - Yummy food you make - Chicken... rice... desserts.
Z - Zodiac Sign - Scorpio. My birthday is in 10 days! Oh hell yes, I will be 22. :)

The Big Five Personality Test

Extroverted	||||||||||||||	56%
Introverted	||||||||||||	44%
Friendly	||||||||||||||||||||	86%
Aggressive	||||	14%
Orderly	||||||||||||||	58%
Disorderly	||||||||||||	42%
Relaxed	||||||||||	38%
Emotional	||||||||||||||||	62%
Intellectual	||||||||||||||||||||	82%
Practical	||||	18%

Take Free Big 5 Personality Test

I cannot belive that John Ritter died. I still don't understand why people die.

Hey guys... I have a lot of stuff to talk about today. Im at work and its 7:06am. Fun. I think all banks should be closed on Saturdays, basically just because it ruins my weekend when I have to work Saturdays. Oh well, its only a few hours then I'll get to go home and see Charlie and puff. I guess I should explain who puff is. Two weeks ago, I adopted two cats from the Humane Society. Coco and Cricket. We affectionatly call Coco, "Puff". He is the MOST BEAUTIFUL cat, but he is quite large. :). He is a Ragdoll, which is a beautiful breed of cat that looks like a mix between a Hymalayan and a Persian. Long hair, beautiful markings, just great!!! He is the sweetest cat in the world. He sleeps with us at night and keeps my feet very warm! I'll post some pictures of him on my website soon. Then there is his brother Cricket. Cricket is just a domestic short hair cat. He also has beautiful markings, but I think Coco is much prettier. These two guys had to come togeher because they have lived together for there whole lives. Cricket is still very scared and timid around us. He is deffinitly coming around, but is no where near to the level that Coco is. Anyway, I love my kitties. They are beautiful and Charlie and I are really enjoying having them around. Lots of fun. Charlie, at first, did not want me to get the kitties because he wanted to get a kitten(coco and cricket are both 3)...but now Charlie loves those kitties more than me!!! Its so cute how he is with them. Everynight he'll stand in the door way and call Coco to come to bed, and Coco does. Its so cute!!!!!!!!!!!
School has started. Yay. <--- That was ment to be very sarcastic. I am taking 16 hours and they are all at Montgomery CC. 13 of those hours are online classes and then I go to one class on Tuesday nights(with my Bouca, Charlie). The classes I am taking are: Business Law, English, Accounting, Goverment, and Economics. I have to do good this semester. If I don't, I might as well quit school. For those of you who want to know, I really have no freaking idea when the crap I will graduate. My major is Finance with an emphasis in Banking and Financial Institutions with a minor in Banking. I hope to graduate in May/December of 2005. If not then, I have no freaking idea when. UGH!!!
The biggest news I have is that I finially got ***MY*** engagement ring. For the past month or so, I have had a plain gold band with my diamond in it...but yesterday, I got my ring!!! Its beautiful. Its a
Tacori band with my 1.1ct princess cut center stone in it. The band is PLATINUM and has 2 princess cut side stones that equal .5cts. Then there are diamonds all the way down the band on the top and the sides of the band. Its my dream ring and I cannot stop looking at it. Charlie and Kam did such an awesome job picking it out. I will take some pictures of it this weekend and post it on my webpage and profile. We are going back to Bailey, Banks and Biddle this afternoon to look at wedding bands for Charlie!!! YAY!
My cute little nephew, Brady started kindergarden at the new school in Montgomery last week! He is sooooo cute and doing so well. He loves going to school, so I hope he keeps that attitude up. My other nephew, Nolan is the most beautiful thing in the world. He has the beautiful blond hair and peircing blue eyes. He is going to be such a hottie! He he he. All the girls will love him. He is such a happy baby. He laughs all the time and just has the biggest smile. He is 8 months old and just growing up so fast. I love both of my nephews so much, they are just such an important part of my life!
The wedding plans are kindof at a stand still. We need to set a date, but haven't really found the time to do that. My parents want us to wait until after college, Charlie's parents want us to go to the Justice of the Peace(ASAP) and Charlie and I would like to get married next September(2004). I know Charlie's parents won't win this one, but I am not sure if my parents might win over Charlie and myself. I guess there needs to be some talking going on. My engagement with Charlie has been awesome... but it doesn't feel like we're engaged. We haven't gotten any cards, any acnoledgement nothing. I want people to fuss over me. I just kinda feel if we were older all of that stuff would happen. I thought that me and my parents and Charlie and others would have a big dinner to celebrate or something. I thought that we would go out with our friends to celebrate, but nope. We have recieved one card, from Charlies parents and his sister. Thats all folks. I just don't understand. Its like we're the only ones that are happy about this. My parents said all of this is because we were in Las Vegas when we got engaged... but I disagree. I think its because Charlie and I have been together so long and it was just expected. I dunno. Maybe I am just being a bitch about it but I expected a few people to say or do some stuff. I dunno. The only thing I am happy about is that my parents want to put an announcement in the paper(s)----> The Courier and the Montgomery whatever. I think that is an awesome idea, but we need to take engagement pictures to do that, and no one seems to want to help pay for those. I guess I just feel like I need some support in this. Charlie is there 110%, so thats not the problem, I just expected my mom, my stepmom or my bestfriend to be excited for me and want to help me with all the planning and setting the date and all the other stuff... but no one really does. Kam is there, don't get me wrong, but for some reason we haven't been very close lately. I don't know if its something I did or something she did or whatever, but it sucks. I need my bestfriend now more than ever, and she's more distant than ever. I know she has a lot going on and all that, but its just weird. For the first time in like 8 years I don't feel like I could go to her if I needed something or just needed to talk. But, the fact is that Charlie and I are in love and we want to get married and spend our lives with each other and if other people aren't excited about that then thats fine. I don't think either of us would have a problem just going somewhere like Vegas or the Bahamas and get married alone if this becomes more of a problem. Im probobaly just overeacting, but this is how I feel. The only main thing I have done in planning the wedding is picking my bridal party. Kam will be my Maid Of Honor, Tiffany (Char's sister) is a bridesmaid. There was another person who was a bridesmaid, but I cannot really tell if she wants to any more or not. I dunno. I guess I just need to calm down and stop bitching about everything...but Im pissed. Charlie knows who he wants in his wedding party but he hasn't asked any of them. I hope he will soon.
Well, I hope everyone has a great Labor Day weekend and I hope you enjoyed the fact that I finially posted in my blog. I will write more soon!!! Happy Birthday Dad!!! (on Sep 4).
Peace.

You have an entrancing kiss~ the kind that leaves
your partner bedazzled and maybe even feeling
he/she is dreaming. Quite effective; the kiss
that never lessens and always blows your
partner away like the first time.


What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

I'm sure it's no big surprise to you that your
romance is The Princess Bride. A heartwarming
tale of "Twue Wuve" that has giants,
Spainards and swashbuckling. You really do
think that love can overcome anything. You may
be a touch naive but your heart is certainly in
the right place. You've probably got one of
those relationships where proper nouns have
been replaced with "Snookums" and
"Pookie Pie". Eww. He he he


What Romance Movie Best Represents Your Love Life?
brought to you by Quizilla

Lion King!


What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

You are Love.

You love life, you love all those around you and
the world that you live in. You are happiest
when you are doing something for someone else
or for the common good of mankind.


What Emotion Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I AM ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CHARLIE AND I ARE SO HAPPY! He purposed on July 21 at about 10:30 pm while we were riding in a gondola at the Venician hotel in Las Vegas, NV. It was sooooo romantic! More details to come!

Hey people! Its been FOREVER since I have written in here. You would think Im like the busiest person in the world. Well Im not. So, I'll give you a quick recap of whats going on in my life. Im living in Conroe in an apartment with Kam. I really think that she's the only one I could ever live with and not hate after about ummmm a month. We're having lots of fun and enjoying our apartment. Charlie and Kam's boyfriend, Jake are also here about 99.999% of the time. I really like Jake he's definitely my favorite when it comes to all the boyfriends Kam has had. I hope he's here to stay. Charlie and Jake also get along really well and are on there way to being really good friends! Charlie is doing awesome and working at Woodforest(a different branch than me) and really enjoying it. We have been together for almost 5 years, and too celebrate our 5 year anniversary we are going to Las Vegas!!! The trip is booked and we couldn't be more excited about going. Kam and Jake are also going with us which should make it twice as fun. We will be gone July 17th- July 22(our anniversary is on the 21). We are staying at the New York New York. Work is going great... my ass is moving on up everyday. I work hard and its paying off. My family is awesome and my nephew, Nolan is almost 7 months old!!! WOW. I can't belive how adorable he gets every time I see him! We babysat the other day and he couldn't have been cuter. I got in a car accident Saturday afternoon... me and Charlie were coming back from tanning and we were pulling into my apartment and this guy backed up into me. Hes paying cash for the repairs, so its all good. I guess all I can say is that my life is going good. And, I hope after I get back from Las Vegas I have lots more to write about!!! I promise to write more. I can start writing at work and stuff cause I really don't get on much when I am at home. Anyway, Im going to go because Im tired as hell. Goodnite. I hope this made you happy RAE!!!

Well here I am back again. I haven't written in forever and I would like to say its because I have been so busy... but I really haven't been that busy I just don't get on the internet anymore. Well I have to first say happy 21st burffday(cough cough *im a loser for saying it like that* cough cough) to chad. I know he probobaly doesn't read this, but its the thought that counts, right? Neway. This post won't be long but I will write more later. I guess just to catch up on things: work is going great(I am working full time 6:30am-3:30pm), Charlie and I are awesome(4 years 11 months), my apartment is a little messy but I love it. And I think thats it. Schools out but summer school starts in a week or so. UGH. Neway I am going to go shower cause I think we're going out tonite... Im just not sure where yet.

That song that I just posted about is me and Charlie's song. It will be our wedding song. We both heard it the other nite and fell in love with it totally. Someone, either Charlie or someone else will sing that at our wedding. Its just awesome and is totally my view twards Charlie. I LOVE YOU BOOK-A.

Edwin McCain - I Could Not Ask For More

Lying here with you,
Listening to the rain,
Smiling just to see, The smile upon your face,
These are the moments, I thank God that I'm alive,
These are the moments, I'll remember all my life,
I found all I've waited for,
And I could not ask for more.
Looking in your eyes,
Seeing all I need,
Everything you are, Is everything to me,
These are the moments, I know heaven must exist,
These are the moments, I know all I need is this,
I have all I've waited for,
And I could not ask for more.

Chorus:
I could not ask for more than this time together,
I could not ask for more than this time with you,
Every prayer has been answered,
Every dream I have's come true,
And right here in this moment, Is right where I meant to be,
Here with you, Here with me. . .

These are the moments, I thank God that I'm alive,
These are the moments, I'll remember all my life,
I've got all I've waited for,
And I could not ask for more. . .

Chorus:
I could not ask for more than this time together,
I could not ask for more than this time with you,
Every prayer has been answered,
Every dream I have's come true,
And right here in this moment, Is right where I meant to be,
Here with you, Here with me. . .

I could not ask for more than the love you gave me,
'Coz it's all I've waited for . . .
And I could not ask for more,
I could not ask for more.

50 Things About Me That Are Cool
1. My middle name is Elisabeth… not Elizabeth. ELISABETH.
2. My birthday is October 27, 1981. Which makes me 21!!! OH YEAH!!!
3. I'm a Scorpio… but that’s not really important because I don’t care about that stuff.
4. I'm a student at SHSU. I am a sophomore by hours and a junior by year. It’s pretty sad that someone I know who graduated a year after me is already a JUNIOR by hours and I’m still a freaking sophomore (**COUGH** **COUGH** BETHANY **COUGH** **COUGH**)
5. My major Banking and Financial Institutions. Yup that’s right, I changed it. I’m going to be a banker. Trust me when I say they make so much more money and I will graduate a lot faster!!!
6. If I could change one thing about college it would be that I would’ve gone to Texas A&M… I regret that big time. I went to SHSU for a dumb reason and though no one (not even my parents) know why. I applied and got accepted to A&M TWICE. Once before college started and once my sophomore year.
7. My main goal at this point is to just graduate college.
8. I used to want to get my masters and whatnot but now… I’m just like, whatever.
9. If I had to pick a favorite subject I think it would be something that has to do with Psychology or speech… and the bad thing is I don’t have to take any of those classes for my major?
10. My least favorite subject is anything that has to do with Science. I did well in those classes in high school… but now I’m sucking them up.
11. I haven’t gotten the “full experience” out of college. I recommend when you go to college (if you’re not already in it) that you get involved in something… anything.
12. My favorite sport is baseball. I don’t watch it much… but I really like it.
13. Oddly enough, I don’t have a favorite team.
14. Truthfully, the only long term boyfriend I’ve had is Charlie. There was a guy I was with forever in middle school and junior high… but I don’t think that counts. And though some may find me only being with one person strange, I think it’s really awesome.
15. Everyone around me is either married or engaged (except Kam). And the really freaking funny part is that I’ve been with Charlie soooooooooooooooooooooo much longer than any of them have been with their boyfriends.
16. I really enjoy going out-out. For those of you who aren’t me or Kam that means like clubs/bars/ext. But, I will not dance. I love to dance, but will not do it in public. Sorry.
17. My favorite movie is anything with Julia Roberts or Jennifer Lopez. Yup, I love me some chick flicks.
18. My favorite actors are Brad Pitt and Ben Affleck. What hotties!!! Jennifer and Jennifer are some lucky ladies!
19. I HATE anything that has to do with Star Wars or Lord of the Rings or any dumb crap like that. Which is really weird because Charlie really likes those dumb movies. ;)
20. I’ve had the same best friend since 8th grade. And, just incase you didn’t know, its Kam Henson.
21. I love my family sooooo much, it just doesn’t work for me to live with them.
22. I would do anything for my nephews- Nolan and Brady; or my cousins- Amie, Allie, Troy, Tyler, Jessica, Ryan and Sarah. They are just all so perfect.
23. When I graduate and get married I think that I want to stay in Texas. I’m not sure if it will be in Montgomery… but I’m pretty sure it will be in Texas.
24. My favorite type of foods are seafood, Mexican and Chinese. Yummy.
25. Which would mean my favorite restaurants are: Pappadeaux (very yummy), Guadalajara and the Chinese place that I don’t know the name of… but Charlie and I affectionately call “Would you like another coka?” (ß that’s a really long story otherwise I would explain it.
26. The TV shows I watch every week are: Friends, American Idol, Fraternity Life/Sorority Life, 7th Heaven, Dawson’s Creek, Real World, and Will & Grace.
27. My favorite books are: the Shopoholic, the Shopoholic takes Manhattan, the Boy Next Door, and the Princess Diary’s series of books.
28. My favorite color is pink. I just love it and wish I had more pink things!!! Ironically, in high school, I hated pink.
29. If for some reason Charlie and I ever broke up, I would ONLY date an older (like 5-7 years older) boy. And he would have to be tall (over 6’1)
30. I like all kinds of music. But, I mostly listen to: pop, punk and country.
31. In high school I was very involved in: band (flute, bass drum), choir (alto 2), yearbook (clubs editor), FCA, church choir, church newsletter and yup I think that’s it.
32. I work at Woodforest National Bank… and I like it so much that I changed my major.
33. I have way too many embarrassing moments to pick just 1.
34. I wish I could live in the Atlantis Resort in the Bahamas for just 1 year with unlimited spending money.
35. Politically, I am very, very, very conservative!
36. I voted for Bush and will vote for him again in 2004. I think he is an awesome president and is doing a kick ass job!!!
37. I wish I could wear my comfy pants (dark blue with rhinestones that say angel) and t-shirt all the time.
38. Every Friday, I have to read the current issue of Us, People, and In Touch.
39. I don’t wear jewelry very often… if I had a nice diamond, I would wear it all the time.
40. I have naturally curly hair… but I hate it when it’s curly so I try to straiten it mostly but it takes me like 2.5 hours to get ready when I do that… ugh.
41. I don't have any tattoos… but I would get one if I was drunk and someone took me.
42. I’m a good person.
43. I have no idea how to do anything on my car, not even change my oil.
44. I LOVE being 21, finally!!! It’s awesome. Being 20 sucked!!!
45. My favorite type of alcohol is rum!!! It’s great! But, I hate Tequilla.
46. My favorite drinks are: Cherry Vodka Sours, Bellinis, MudSlides, Drunken Monkey, Buttery Nipples, Mai Tais, daquris, and sour apple puckers.
47. My favorite thing about me is my hair. But when it is curly it is my LEAST favorite thing about me.
48. I am very hard to sleep with(SLEEP- as in REST).
49. I sing a lot when Im sad, tired, or mad.
50. When I am mad, sad, bored, blah there are only 2 people who can make me feel better- Kam and Charlie! (Okay and maybe my nephews and cousins) :)

Well, hello. Its been forever since I have posted a long entry. Tons of things have changed. I am now currently living in Conroe in an awesome apartment with my bestfriend, Kam. Its awesome. The apartment is still kinda a mess, but we still have tons of stuff to organize and put away. We will probobaly have a party of some sort in a few weeks... if your invited, you will hear about it. LOL. :P. Me and Charlie are awesome. He loves that I have my own apartment. ;). Charlie is just an all around awesome guy. He joined the softball team at his work(Pappadeaux) and they will start playing every Monday nite. Fun fun fun!!! My work is going fine. Nothing to brag or complain about. When school gets out, I will be working the 6:30-1:30(or 2:30) shift!!! Which sounds like it sucks, but it doesn't!!! Anyway. I am at work and can't type long, so I will write more tonite. XOXOX

THOUGHTS ON THE WAR
By Dennis Miller

All the rhetoric on whether or not we should go to war
against Iraq has got my insane little brain spinning
like a roulette wheel. I enjoy reading opinions from
both sides, but I have detected a hint of confusion
from some of you.

Here are 10 things to consider when voicing an opinion
on this important issue:

1) President Bush and Saddam Hussein.....Hussein is
the bad guy.

2) If you have faith in the United Nations to do the
right thing, keep this in mind. They have Libya
heading the Committee on Human Rights and Iraq
heading the Global Disarmament Committee. Do
your own math here.

3) If you use Google Search and type in "French
Military Victories," your reply will be "Did you mean
French Military Defeats?"

4) If your only anti-war slogan is "No war for oil,"
sue your school district for allowing you to slip
through the cracks and robbing you of the
education you deserve.

5) Saddam and Bin Laden will not seek United Nations
approval before they try to kill us.

6) Despite what some seem to believe, Martin Sheen is
NOT the President. He just plays one on TV.

7) Even if you are anti-war, you are still an
"Infidel" and Bin Laden wants you dead, too.

8) If you believe in a "vast right-wing conspiracy," but
not in the danger that Hussein poses, quit hanging out
with the Dell computer dude.

9) We are not trying to liberate them.

10) Whether you are for military action, or against
it, our young men and women overseas are fighting for
us to defend our right to speak out. We all need to
support them without reservation.

Its Saturday night and I should be out or doing something fun...but I am at home watching Saturday Nite Live. Christina Agulera is the music guest and she just sang "Beautiful." Well, I like her singing, but Im not a huge fan of her personally... but that song just really gets to me every time I hear it.

Hey, I am at work...but not working. Fun stuff. :-). I am at Conroe Downtown today and they can't find the keys so I have to wait until 9am and then I still may not even work. So, I decided to post on here instead!!! Last night I was supposed to go to Java Jazz to see Chad's band play. Well, that didn't happen. Charlie and me and Kam and some of Charlie's friends(from Pappadeaux) were gunna go. Well, Charlie couldn't go. His friend Fogle(Jason) got fired on Thursday night and so, Char had to cover his shift Friday. So that ment he wasn't going and his friends wern't going. So, that left me and Kam. And, as far as I knew we were on and then at like 5:45pm(the concert started at 7:45pm) I found out that she didn't get off work till 8pm and even then she didn't want to go because she was going out with her new boyfriend, Jake. So, it was going to be me all by myself going. And I got pissed off and went home. I ended up babysitting my nephew, Nolan!!! He's such a cutie. He is 3 months old now and just adorable. He would just sit there and smile at me and giggle. It was soooooooooooo cute!!! Thankfully, I only had to change 1 diaper(SP???) and it was just pee. :-). Its the little things that excite you when you babysit a 3 month old. I then went home and went to bed because I had to get up this morning at 5:45am. YUCK! Well, some girl just came up here and gave me my keys and now Im actually working. We aren't too busy. But whatever. So, anyway. Im leaving work at noon, going to get my nails refilled and then have lunch with Charlie. Then i'll go home and take and nap and clean for the rest of the day. Fun stuff. I am officially on Spring Break...but I don't think I am doing anything exciting. On either Thursday, Friday or Saturday I am going to College Station to the Northgate Music Festival. Weeee. Well, I should go work now. Bye bye.

There is this website I used to go to frequently and take these little cute quizes and post the results on here...but now its like all porn crap. Ugh. Just pisses me off!!!

Someone sent me a link to go to a webpage and you type in all this info and it tells you your "PORNO NAME" the website said my name would be: FELACIA TOUNGEMASTER. Thats interesting??????????????????????????? Okay, well I just wanted to share. Bye bye.

Ummmmmm. Paul and Tiff came down yesterday and I got to see them today. Short, but sweet. They are happily married, yay for them. :-). Well, I should go. Nothing huge planed for Spring Break yet. The only thing so far is Chad's band is playing a show at Java Jazz in Spring on Friday and me and Kam are going...so you should too. Ummm hopefully I will have more plans asap. Im gunna go now. *love u*

Not much has been going on in the life of Julie. School. Work. Charlie. Thats pretty much it. Pretty boring ehhh? I got a ticket Sunday night. Well, actually 2 tickets... one for speeding(50 in a 30) and one for not having my licsense. YAY JULIE! It pissed me off soooooo bad, because I thought that it was a 45mph zone. UGH. The cop was such an ass!!! I could have just beat him down. :P. Me and Charlie had just left his house to go get some dinner for us and we were on our way home and the dumb ass stoped me. I haven't ever seen a cop on that road, so I dunno what his freakin deal was. School is okay. I gotta start studying more. I have got to make good grades this semester. I have no choice. If I don't make better grades I will be kicked out. UGH. Me and Kam are getting an apartment together this summer. We were gunna get one this month but we couldn't find one we liked, so we are on the waiting list for June I think. SHSU is retarded so our Spring Break isn't until next week. I have no plans so far but me and Kam may go somewhere for a few days and me and Charlie may go somewhere for a few days. So, that gives me something to look forward too. Well, I should go, but I may write more tonite.

I also think you should check out THIS website!!! I loved playing that game when I was younger! Lots of fun. I will put my answers that I got on here later. Oh by the way the game is mash!!!

I love this song. It gives me chill bumps when I hear it. Enjoy.

'Have You Forgotten' ~Darryl Worley
I HEAR PEOPLE SAYING WE DON¹T NEED THIS WAR
I SAY THERE'S SOME THINGS WORTH FIGHTING FOR
WHAT ABOUT OUR FREEDOM AND THIS PIECE OF GROUND
WE DIDN'T GET TO KEEP 'EM BY BACKING DOWN
THEY SAY WE DON'T REALIZE THE MESS WE'RE GETTING IN
BEFORE YOU START YOUR PREACHING LET ME ASK YOU THIS MY FRIEND
HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN HOW IT FELT THAT DAY
TO SEE YOUR HOMELAND UNDER FIRE
AND HER PEOPLE BLOWN AWAY
HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN WHEN THOSE TOWERS FELL
WE HAD NEIGHBORS STILL INSIDE GOING THRU A LIVING HELL
AND YOU SAY WE SHOULDN¹T WORRY ABOUT BIN LADEN
HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN
THEY TOOK ALL THE FOOTAGE OFF MY T.V.
SAID IT'S TOO DISTURBING FOR YOU AND ME
IT'LL JUST BREED ANGER THAT'S WHAT THE EXPERTS SAY
IF IT WAS UP TO ME I'D SHOW IT EVERYDAY
SOME SAY THIS COUNTRY'S JUST OUT LOOKING FOR A FIGHT
AFTER 9/11 MAN I'D HAVE TO SAY THAT'S RIGHT
I'VE BEEN THERE WITH THE SOLDIERS
WHO'VE GONE AWAY TO WAR
AND YOU CAN BET THAT THEY REMEMBER
JUST WHAT THEY'RE FIGHTING FOR
HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN ALL THE PEOPLE KILLED
SOME WENT DOWN LIKE HEROES IN THAT PENNSYLVANIA FIELD
HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN ABOUT OUR PENTAGON
ALL THE LOVED ONES THAT WE LOST AND THOSE LEFT TO CARRY ON
DON'T YOU TELL ME NOT TO WORRY ABOUT BIN LADEN
HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN

So, yes, today is Sunday. The day where we should relax and blah blah blah. Well, I have to tell ya, I am bored as hell. Amy's parents(Hal & Bev) came down from Illinois on Friday and it has been very nice to see them. Today them and my parents went down to my Grandpa's house until Monday night. So, I am here bored as hell(<---ooops I think I already said that). Charlie is working a double at Pappadeaux today. Blah. My parents are gone. Blah. And I guess thats all I have. Sometimes I wish I was out of college, married and had a career. It would solve all of my problems. I am about sick of fickle people. I hate it. There is just so much I wish I could say and elaborate on...but I can't. I am just angry right now I could scream!!!!!!!!! UGH. Okay, well I should go. I am not sure what I will do all day, but whatever.

HEAD UP YOUNG PERSON

La la la la la la la. :). Not too much is going on. School sucks, as always. Work is good. Charlie rocks. So, I am not sure what I am going to write about here. Ummmmmmmmmmm. Amy's parents(Hal&Bev) are coming down for a week starting this Friday. I can't wait to see them. They are awesome people. :). I am not sure what the plans are for this weekend. I think that Friday we are all going to Huntsville to a party to see Chad's band play. I don't think I have seen Chad in like almost 2 years. Maybe a little bit less... but you never know. And, I deffinitly haven't heard his band...so yeah. I dunno if for sure thats gunna happen, but I am thinking yes. I need to know details first and I haven't gotten any from him yet. Sometime this weekend I am going out-out. I am in the mood to do that and I gotta. :-). Charlie may be getting a new SUV. It will be a 2003 black Chevy Trailblazer. They are so freaking awesome!!! And he is getting a good deal on one. I got a new cellphone. It is too cute. Silver & small. :-). Ne-who. I should go cause I don't have anything to say. So, blah blah blah. ~muhwah~

BLEH! I was crying in my cherrios last night cause I was abandoned by everyone. :P. Charlie went to Josh's to hang out/practice/go out afterwards. Kam ditched me to go on another date with this guy named Jake. My parents were gunna ditch me and go out on a "date" but instead they took me to dinner with them. So, BLAH. The only people who really love me are my parents. Te he he. I rented like 3 movies last night, but I didn't watch any of them cause I fell asleep! :-). I am so lazy! But, it is good that I went to bed early because I had to get up this morning at 5am to be at work at 6:40am. Getting up that early sucks. I am at work now and it isn't that bad. Every third Saturday(which is today) I have to go to the Conroe Downtown Branch and work the motor bank. Its easy. No people in your face or anything. :-). After I get off which is in EXACTLY 1 HOUR I get to go eat lunch with my Charlie and then I will go home and take a short nap, watch a movie, clean my room and bake 4(yes, four) batches of cookies. One batch is for Charlie, one is for my parents and I cannot say who the other two are for!!! They are gunna be chocolate chip cookies made from scratch. Yummm! Charlie works tonite at Pappadeaux, so I am not sure what I will be doing. If Kam calls and wants to do something then I will, but I am not gunna call and ask her to do anything. I did that yesterday and got ditched. Te he he. Well, I got more news about my Uncle yesterday. He went to a new doctor(the one my Aunt(cheyrlynne) works for) and that woman gave him good and bad news. She told him the cancer had spread to his throat(which she said was very minor), and either his kidney or liver(I don't remember which...). On Tuesday he is having an MRI done to see whats going on and he is also having some sort of P.E.T.(<-That may be the wrong word...I can't remember though) SCAN on Wednesday, which will tell him where the cancer has spread too and then he has an appointment Thursday to discuss all of this. I don't really know how to react to all of this. No one in my family has ever really been sick besides my Great Grandma, but she was very old and it was expected. My uncle is only 52 and our family isn't ready to let go of him. This has done one good thing though, all my family is speaking a lot more and that is very good. We all gotta have a lot of love and prayers and be strong for him. Also, I think he is somewhat believing in God(if not totally). He told Amy yesterday that if he did die it woud be okay because he knew where he would go and who he would spend eternity with. So, please pray...this is a very hard thing for my family. Well, I should go I have written a lot of stuff and I am at work...so maybe I should work! :P. Have a great day...its very pretty outside.

Well, hello. Not too much has been going on in my life. Though it seems a lot is going on with everyone else I know. Kam and her boyfriend, Chris, broke up, for good. Its a really good thing though because he was not that nice of a guy. She is living at home and hoping to get her own apartment sometime in the near future. So if you know a good guy who is not too tall but not short(5'10ish), is financially stable, atleast 23, has a nice house/apartment and is good looking and funny let her know. :-). Paul and Tiffany's wedding pictures FINIALLY came in and they are coming down Wednesday and going to look at them Thursday. I bet the pictures are just beautiful. I also found out that Chad and Bethany are back together. I think that is great. Beth seems really happy and excited! Ummmm, whatelse. Amy's parents are coming down from Illinois from February 28-March 8. I'm very excited to see them its been like almost 2 years since I have. UGH :P. Two days before that my uncle, Howard, is having major surgury. They found a lump the size of a large cantaloupe in his rib cage. He finds out this week if it spread to any major organs. The lump is cancerous and its very scary. My uncle is being very strong though and we are all trying to be very strong for him. The doctor told him if he didn't have surgury he would have only 6 months to live. This is very complicated and basically 6 months ago he went to the doctor because he was in pain and they told him it was nothing and gave him pain reliver, and he went back a few weeks later with worse pain and they still said it was nothing and now he finds out that he could only have 6 months to live? Well, he is suing the doctor. And there is no doubt that he will win. This doctor is a MORON. Anyway. So if you belive in prayer please pray for him. His name is Howard Kirby and he has surgury on February 26th. Please pray for him and my family... He is also not a Christian so pray for that also. Well, Im gunna go cause I am at Charlie's house. ***muhwah***

Here is the poem Charlie wrote me for Valentines Day(I'll post more about that day tomorrow):


my sun shines because of you
my soul is alive because i have heard your voice
i will never let the sun go down without telling you how much i love you

i love you for all that you are
i love you with all that i am

my heart is held captive by your love
and that's where i wish to stay for the rest of my days
safe in your arms

i want to be everything you have ever wanted
i want to give you all of my soul
i want to be right beside you
and i never want to let you go

i love you for all that you are
i love you with all that i am
i love you with all of my being

I think its a conspiracy. Everyone I know is getting engaged. Is this a plot to make Julie go completely out of her mind? If so you people are succeeding. You people are giving me a coronary. Charlie...are you in on this? Do you really hate me and you are just pretending to love me to make me think that I might get engaged and then dump me? I am starting to think so. Please could someone please admit me into a mental hospitol? I think I need it. Prozac? PLEASE!!! My mind is constantly on getting married, getting engaged, why I am not engaged, when I will get engaged, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Okay. LA LA LA LA. Kam's not engaged, she's my only ally...but I do think she will get married before me. Okay now that you all officially think I am insane, I will go to bed.

HELP!!!!

Hey all. I am about to write something very personal to me. Maybe thats the wrong word. Basically, I probobaly shouldn't write this on here, but I am because this blog helps me get my emotions out. I don't know who all reads this(okay actually I know of 3 regulars), so its like my way of getting how I feel out without the volnerability of telling someone your problems? Maybe that doesn't make sense, but who cares. Neways. Its about Charlie and I. We have been together for almost 5 years and I honestly don't think we are anywhere near getting engaged. This hurts me more than anything. I have put my heart and life into this relationship and I am wondering why. I know he loves me, and I love him...that is NOT the issue. I am ready for some sort of commitment and I feel like everyone else in my life is getting engaged/married and I am just sitting here kinda looking dumb. I watched 7th Heaven tonite and Lucy and Ben finially got engaged. It was the most romantic thing. I also know of about 3 people who are getting purposed to/purposing on Valentines day. Two girls at my work got engaged last week. Many of my friends/aquaintances are engaged or married. I dunno. Im just sad about this. I want to marry Charlie and spend my life loving him and being with him...but I cannot waist my life for something that may not happen. Now some of you may say well hey Julie, if you wanted a ring that wasn't sooooo expensive then maybe you would be engaged, but that isn't true at all. Charlie has made NO effort to save money for any ring. One that costs $100 or one that costs $10,000. That shows that he doesn't care. I dunno. I am so confused. Marriage is something that I want very much in my life(not now, i want to wait till I graduate to get married). And Charlie is the one I want to marry. I can imagine our wedding day(and night lol) and thats what I want. I can imagine him asking my father if he can purpose and then him purposing to me and it being wonderful, and showing off my ring to everyone and just glowing and then one day getting married. I dunno. If you have any advice, insight let me know.

Welp, I haven't posted on here in forever. Im sorry. I know I have let down Beth and Paul. He he he. :-). A lot has been going on in my life. Lets start with work first. I transfered to a different branch. I am now at the Loop-336 branch right next to Hastings.Which leads me to school. I have changed my major. I found out that I wouldn't graduate until May or December of 2006 if I stayed an Elementary Education major. Basically because SHSU is retarded and they keep changing the classes we need. So, my new major is Finance with an Emphasis in Commercial Banking; and a minor in Banking. And with that change I will either graduate in August of 2004, December of 2004 or May of 2005... just depending on how the class scheduling works out. In my personal life not much has changed. Me and Charlie are still together and stronger than ever. We've been together for 4 years and 6 months...almost 7. Isn't that great? I think so. For Valentines Day we don't know what we are going to be doing. Its between- Kemah, Kobe, Dave & Busters, Magic Island, The Old Sanfrancisco Steak House or Pappa Bros. Steak House. Then after wherever we eat, we are going to Dave & Busters. :-). It will be fun, and I don't have to work the next day or the next or the next(cause we are closed for Presidents Day{BANKS ROCK WITH HOLIDAYS}). Ummm... what else. My family is doing great. Nolan will be 2 months old on February 12, 2003 and he weighs over 12 pounds. He's the cutest thing in the world. I love him so much. I have posted some new pictures of him on my website in a cute little Eeyore outfit. I will also be updating my webpage very soon. With tons of new pictures and all new content. I will post it on here when I do an update. Well, I think that is about it for now. I will start posting more frequently. Luv ya. ;)

Here is a little survey. Maybe it will make you know a little bit more about me. ;). I am too tired to post a real entry tonite, but I will tomorrow!!! Nite nite. *luv ya*

Three things that scare me:
tests
the dark
being home alone

Three people who make me laugh:
(sorry I can't pick 3)
Charlie
Paul & Tiff
Dad & Amy
Brady & Nolan
Rene & Matt
Kam

Three things I love:
my family
charlie
my friends

Three things I hate:
school
getting up early(YUCK)
spiders

Three things I don't understand:
why people have to change
football
why Ross & Rachel aren't together on friends

Three things on my desk:
pink candles
pink picture frames
dreamsicle angels

Three things I'm doing right now:
filling this out
watching "Boy Meets World"
drinking a Dr. Pepper

Three things I want to do before I die:
make a significant difference in someones life
get married
have children

Three things I can do:
be supportive/listen to people
decorate very well
learn quickly

Three ways to describe my personality:
emotional
loving
supportive

Three ways to describe my looks:
(this was very hard...very very hard)
pretty hair(when its straight)
pretty smile
nice eyes

Three things I can't do:
spell
draw
dance(though I love to do it)

Three things I think you should listen to:
your heart
God
Simple Plan/NFG/Nsync/Blink 182/Good Charolote/JEW

Three things I don't think you should listen to:
democrats
bad people
Michael Jackson(I couldn't think of another one... I just don't like him)

Three things I say the most:
oh my goodness
i love you
rigggghhhhhtttttt

Three of your absolute favourite foods:
mashed potatos
mac & cheese
chicken(all ways)

Three things you'd like to learn:
more about education/teaching children
more about God
history so i don't have to take it again

Three beverages you drink regularly:
coke
sweet tea
dr. pepper w/vanilla

Three shows you watched when you were a kid:
(sadly I would still watch all of these if they were still on, and when they are on I do watch them)
Full House
Saved by the Bell
Beverly Hills 90210

Well hello. I told you I would post today and I am. So, as promised here is my list of things I would like to do before I die. Enjoy.
1. Make a significant difference in someones life. 2. Help one child, who otherwise wouldn't, succeed. 3. Get married. 4. Have atleast two children, but prefferebly four. 5. Go to Australia and hold a Koala and pet a kangaroo. 6. See my nephews and cousins grow up and become happy adults. 7. Make sure my parents know how much I love them. 8. Have everyone that I love and am close to be in one room on whatever occasion it happens to be. 9. Meet Lance Bass(don't laugh). 10. Mend some relationships with old friends(not all of them...but some). 11. Go on a cruise. 12. Graduate from college. 13. To swim with dolphins. 14. Have a room in my house that is totally pink. Imagine Anna Nicole Smith's bedroom, minus Bobby Trendy and Anna Nicole Smith. ;). 15. Make all A's a few semesters in school again. 16. Have self confidence. 17. Experience something more powerful than that Tuesday nite on the Youth Trip(summer between sophomore and junior year). 18. Write a book. 19. Get a tatoo. 20. Go to New York.
Well thats all I am going to post tonite. I will keep posting more over the next few days. Last nite was soooo much fun. Me and Charlie went to Pappadeaux with my parens and had a very nice time! :-). Unfortunitly Charlie is working tonite so after I got off of work at noon I spent some time with him which was nice and then I went home and took a nap and cleaned. YUCK! Tomorrow is "Super Bowl Sunday" and I don't really care anything about that but my brother is having a party at his house so we're going over there. And I am very excited that Tuesday me and Charlie and his parents are going up to Marshall to see Paul & Tiff. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I found someone to talk to about church/God. Well, actually they found me. Funny how that works isn't it? I haven't talked to Kam in a while. She is mad at me and I don't really know why. I am kind of sick of it. I want to be her friend, but you can want in one hand and fill the other one with what you actually get and see which one gets filled faster. I think she knows that I am here if she wants to have a friendship, but if she doesn't I guess that is just another point in my life that I will have to move past. Well, I should go. I didn't complete what I had sat out to do tonite, so tomorrow I will post more here and update my webpage. Oh, and you should all check out New Found Glory, Good Charolote and Simple Plan cause I LOVE THEM! Its not a new thing I just wanted to share!!! ***muhwah***

I have a lot to post about, and will do so tomorrow but here is a sneak peak. I watched "A Walk To Remember" tonite and Jaime had a list of things to complete before she was not in this earth any more. Well, I have been working on my little list, and I won't reveal it now(I will tomorrow) but I will give you my #1. Some of you may think its selfish or whatever, but here it is. The thing I want most out of life is that whenever I die I want to have ATLEAST touched someones life. Helped them like no one else could. I don't think I would feel like a complete person if I didn't know that I had helped someone in some way or another. I think the sad thing about life is that we don't tell people how we feel about them or stuff like that until they are gone and then well its too late. There is one person I know who is a person I often say I hate. And though I have some very very horrible feelings twards this person, this person was the person who made me go to church with them and showed me the love that God has for all of us. This person prayed the prayer of Salvation with me when I was balling my eyes out and also lead my family too all these things. For this I wil be eternally grateful. Now, with all of that said some of my thoughts about some of the beliefs of the Baptist church have changed, but my faith of God hasn't. There is also another person in my life whom I do not even close to hate, its just that we don't speak hardly ever(6 times a year...maximum), but we were very close friends, best friends at one point of our lives. This person through many ways, which I didn't like taught me that in life you have to move on, and though you can't always be bestfriends with everyone forever that instead of being mad that they are not in your life anymore be HAPPY that they were in your life and for whatever time period that was it was a blessing. Anyway, Im taking away from tomorrow(or quite possibly Saturday's) post. I have been blessed with many friends in my life. The strange thing is that they haven't all been at once. I don't have many friends right now. Many aquaintances(sp???) whom I go out with and have fun and stuff... but true friends those who are there through the good and bad I can count on less than one hand. And some people may think that is sad, but I don't. Well, I should go. I think that I should talk to someone about my feelings twards Church/God, but I don't know of anyone who would be appropriate. My feelings are so messed up because of what happend at FBC-Moco and I think I should talk it out with someone, but I dunno who. Let me know if you have any suggestions, thoughts, concerns and all that jazz!!! I gotta go to bed but I PROMISE to post tomorrow or Saturday with my list of things to do and other thoughts. I love you all, no matter who you are.

WELL HELLO! I haven't posted in like 10 days, but thats okay. ;). School has started. Wee, what a joy. My classes aren't too hard which makes things boring, but all except one are boring as CRAPOLA! On M/W/F I get out right at 12pm and have to go strait to work. I don't like that. I want time to relax and sit on my butt and watch some TV. ;). On Tu/Th I get out at 11am and get to be home for an hour. Thats nice. Next week on Tuesday after I get out of work me, Charlie and his parents are going up too Marshall to see Tiffany and Paul. We're gunna come home late Wednesday night. I can't wait to see them. Nolan has gained about 1 or 1&1/2 pounds. He is adorable. I took some pictures of him the other day and they are too cute. I'll scan them tonight and post them on my website ASAP. I also got back more pictures of Tiffany's wedding. They are PERFECT. They are of me & Tiffany, and a few of the four of us. I'll scan and post those tonite also. la la la. Oh this weekend I did something really big. I totally cleaned and organized my room. I cleaned out my closet also. I also changed out many picture frames that had pictures of people I am not really friends with any more in them. I replaced them with people I am actually friends with, or more recent pictures. That was really hard for me because I am not good with change and stuff like that. But, I was very proud of myself. I will post something up here when I have updated my website tonite. I hope you all have a rockin day. ***muhwahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh***

HEY! Last nite was nice. We went to dinner at my brothers house and had spaghetti and salad and yummy bread. I got to see Nolan and OH MY GOODNESS has he gained some weight. When he was born he weighed 5 pounds & 4 ounces... when he left the hospitol he weighed 5 pounds... he now on his 1 month BIRTHDAY(01/12/03- happy birthday buddy, auntie julie loves you) weighs 9 pounds!!! He is growing and is absolutly adorable. He is starting to look more like my brother than Rene'. Its just great. I love that little guy. And the great thing is that me and Amy get to babysit him this coming Saturday. YAY! Brady is going through a weird faze where he is totally jealous of Nolan, but we are all hoping he will get over it. ;). ummmm, whatelse? School starts on Wednesday and I am not really looking forward too it, but I have to. So, I am trying to have a positive attitude. I will actually be paying for my education myself this semester. I will have to use almost every dime that I make at Woodforest to pay for it...but it will work out. If anyone wants to make any donations to my account just go to Woodforest National Bank, ask for a checking deposit slip and write down my account number(just ask me for it) and deposit all you wanna!!! Trust me I won't mind. And I am deffinitly not to proud to take donations from ANYONE!!! So, yah. I got a little "care" package for Tiff & Paul cause I needed to mail Tiffany back her copy of "Lilo & Stich" which I borrowed before the wedding. The package is more for Tiff than Paul...but thats okay cause Paul makes fun of me and my speeling(just kidding I can spell spelling... and I don't dislike Paul... I think he is perfect for Tiff and I enjoy being around him)!!! Well, I am going to go to bed because I have to work tomorrow from 8:30a-4:30p instead of my usual 1:30p-6:30p cause a lady who has been out sick for like a week is still sick!!! But, I am getting like so many more hours so I can't complain. My pay check should be really good, which is great cause I need the money very badly. Well, I should go for now, but I will probobaly write more on here tomorrow. *muhwah*

Well, HEY! I haven't posted in a few days...but I am not sure why. I haven't been too terribly busy or anything like that. Charlie has been working pretty much every nite at Pappadeaux which is good because he is making a lot of money, but bad because I am not seeing him as much as I would like. Pretty much everything having to do with school and such has changed. I am going to be going this semester. I dunno if I am taking 15 or 18 hours. I might drop one class because I don't know if my branch manager will let me leave early on Monday nights. If she does I will take 18 hours...but if not, 15 will be just fine. I have really gotta get my crap together this semester. I really don't have any other choice. Im kinda looking forward to one of my classes, Philosyphy(SP???)...it should be kinda cool. I have a lot of oppenions on what we will be disscussing in there. Some of the topics will be: abortion(which I am totally against 215+%), the existance of "God"(DUH!!! how could you be alive and in this world and not realize that God is present around us at all times) and other stuff like that. It should really be an interesting class. Other than school about to start not much is going on in my life. I can't complain about much. I bought two cards a few days ago...I know who 1 will go too but I am not quite sure about the other. It could go to the same person or maybe one other person...who knows. Well, I am gunna go. I will probobaly write more tonite. We are going to dinner at my brother's house. It'll be nice to see Nolan and Brady!!! *muh-wah*

Okay, continuing on to my wedding! He he he. I know who my maid of honor will be and she will do a great job!!! Charlie isn't sure who he wants his bestman to be though. I know that my bridesmaids dresses will be some shade of pink. Prefferabley bright pink...but I am not for sure on that yet. The shoes will all be the same, so that will eliminate any drama that the bridesmaids wanna have. I will let them all do their hair however they wanna though...but prefferabley all up or all down. I am not sure what I want my dress to look like. I really liked Tiff's dress, so if it looked kinda like that I wouldn't complain. :). I gotta go again, cause I am about to leave work. Bye bye bye

Well, hello. Tiffany's wedding has really given me "bridal fever." My bridesmaids will be: Tiffany(Moon), Kam(Henson) and I think 2 more...but I am not sure on those 2. And I will have 2 junior bridesmaids: Amie and Allie(Hogan). Charlie wants his groomsmen to be: Paul(Moon), Josh(Baldwin)...and he will also have 2 more that he hasn't totally decided on. And he will also have 2 junior groomsmen: Troy and Tyler(Hogan). My nephew, Brady will be our ring barrer and Nolan will be an "honorary" ring barrer...unless he is old enough to walk by the time we get married. I want Rachel Elder to sing one song and Nate and Cassandra Saffle to sing another song. My color(s) will be a few shades of pink. I will wear cool little white decorated flipflops as my shoes. I want to walk down the isle to Cannon in D...not the bridal march thingy. I want to get married in a church but I will not get married in First Baptist Montgomery. I want the church to be dark...just lit by a few lights and the rest will be candle light and I want it to be filled beautiful flowers... some real, some fake. I want the rehersal dinner to be at my parents house and we will have fajitas and play in the pool and stuff like that. For my bachelorette party I want to go to the spa for the day and then out that nite with friends and then a slumber party. I want the food at the reception to be bar-b-que: chicken, sausage, brisket, patato salad, beans, bread and all that little snacky stuff. The cake I am not too sure about. Tiffany's cake had crystalized sugar all over it which gave it a very pretty "glitter" affect and I know I want that on there...but besides that I have no idea. I would like alcohol at my wedding...but I am not sure what kind. Possibly just champagne...but who knows. I want there to be some tosts done at the wedding. The bestman and maid-of-honor will deffinitly do one, but if anyone else wants to they can. There will be a few dances...but not many. If my bridesmaids cause drama they will not be bridesmaids. I will NOT put up with any crap. :) Ne-who I will post more later...I am at work and its almost time for us to close! :-)

I have started a new thing... Once a week or every other week I am going to send someone a card. Maybe someone different every week or maybe the same person 2 weeks in a row. I dunno. I know that I love to recieve mail and I think other people might like to also. We'll see how it goes. A card doesn't cost more than 4 bucks and a stamp is like 34 cents...so its a cheap way to brighten someones day! :-) I got more pics back from the wedding and from the bridal shower I will post them on my website soon!!! Tiff and Paul come back tomorrow from the honneymoon... I would really like to see Tiffany before they go back to Marshall, but since Charlie works at Pappadeaux I dunno if I will be able too.

Well, I haven't posted in a while, but a lot has been going on in my life!!! First of all, Tiffany Edinburgh became Tiffany Moon. :-). It was such a beautiful wedding. Lots of pink stuff which I LOVE!!! Tiffany's dress was beautiful. It was all sparkly and had a few touches of pink on it. She also wore tennis shoes that we very cutely decorated!!! Very "Father of the Bride." I got to walk down the isle with Charlie and when he took me to where I was standing he gave me a very sweet kiss, which I liked. he he he. The wedding went very well. I cried and so did Charlie and pretty much everyone else. It was very sureal to see Charlie's baby sister getting married. Tiff didn't look nervous at all the whole day. She is a very strong gal. When the wedding was over we took pictures and stuff and then went to the reception. We ate some pretty good bar-b-que and then Tiffany and Paul cutted the cake and fed each other. They were very nice though and didn't smear any on each others faces. ;). Tiffany visited with a bunch of different people for a while and then she danced with Paul to "When I See You Smile" and then with her Dad to "Butterfly Kisses." Both dances were very nice. After that, Aaron, Charlie and Tiff's younger cousin, sang to Tiffany and it was very cute!!! Then it was time for one of my favorite things... when Tiffany tossed her bouquet to all the single gals!!! You would never guess who cought it?!?!?!?! ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I didn't really give anyone else a chance to catch it though. :). Then a while later Tiff & Paul left. :(. BUT, they went to Charlie's house to change and I went there and helped Tiffany take her vail off(IT WAS A PAIN...WAY TOO MANY BOBBYPINS) and I gave them one last gift and a card that was very sweet and off they went to their honneymoon in New Orlenes. They come back Tuesday and will spend the nite at Char's house and then go to their HOME on Wednesday. Its kinda sad because they live so far away. And Tiffany and I finially became close and they are far away and we won't see each other hardly at all. :(. I guess thats part of growing up though. Welp, I should go cause I am at work...but I might post later tonite. :)

Here is something that I found on Beth's website. Enjoy! I won't post anything else right now, but eiher tonite or tomorrow I have a LOT to write about...so check back soon.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.
You are NOT as fat as you imagine.
Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.
Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.
Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.
Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.
Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen.

HEY!!! It is 7am and I am at work already. YUCKY!!! It sucks but so far I haven't had any coustomers. I mean seriously, who banks at 7am? NOT ME!!! I am here by myself with just a police officer. Hes nice. Things have been going good. Well, atleast normal. I got some expected but bad news a day or so ago. My parents won't be paying for school any more. Im not upset about it because it is my own fault... I am not sure if I will be taking a semester off or getting loans. Either way is really fine with me. Basically, they said if your GPA isn't above _._ _ then we will not be paying. I was lazy and didn't study like I should have and my gpa was below that. This leads me to the next thing. The only reason Charlie and I weren't getting married is because my parents would stop paying for school if we did. So, now that they won't be paying any way, there is nothing stoping us from getting married. Between school loans and his job and my job we would be fine. I am thinking about this hard. I could barely sleep last night just thinking about it. I mean I know we're young...but we really aren't. We are both 21, have good jobs so why not? We are in love and we have been for a long time. There is nothing stoping us anymore. Well, hummmmm. I will let you all know what happens in this situation, Im sure your just dying to know. Just think, if we got married on July 21, 2003...then I would be getting married in 7 months. WOW!!! I dunno...maybe I am just rambling on and on and on. Who knows? ***MUHWAH***

Okay, so I know that seriously "thinking" should be more than like 3 hours...but I think that Charlie and I should get married this summer. The one thing that was stoping us...isn't any more. hummmm. JULIE NEEDS ADVICE!!!!!! HELP!!!!!!

Well, this Sunday is Tiffany's BRIDAL SHOWER that Britney and I are throwing her. It should be fun...but you people need to RSVP!!! Its sooooooo rude not too!!! ;). I am about ready for the wedding. I still need shoes, a sucky iney thingy, and some hair jewlery to make me all purrty. :-). I can imagine that Tiff is getting so excited and nervous. I think she has 8 more days!!! WOW! I wish I was 8 days away from my wedding. Something happend today though that might bring Charlie and I closer to marraige. I won't disclose it here atleast for a little while. It just has something to do with finances. I guess I should start seriously thinking about it though??? humph??? I think that if we did get married any time soon, we would go to VEGAS!!! Wouldn't that be lots of fun? I would be totally up for that. Go to Vegas get married then go to the Bahamas and have a wonderful honeymoon. I guess I should talk to Charlie about this??? he he he. I'll post more later cause I am at work!!!

Nolan went to the doctor today and he weighed 6 pounds and 4 ounces!!! The little guy has gained 1 pound in 2 weeks!!! Thats really good. :-).

Well Merry Christmas guys!!! I hope you all had a great one. I got so much stuff, its just crazy. I got picture frames, candles, apartment stuff, gift certificates, money, decorative pillows, a huge credit twards me and Chars cell phone bill(this was very much needed, we like don't have to pay for 3 months), and so much more. Thats not why I love Christmas though, I love it because I get to spend time with my family and Charlie's. Ne-who, I don't have time to post much I need to clean up my room and then go to bed!!! And once again, I hope you all had a very merry Christmas and will have a happy new year! ***only 10 more days tiffany*** ;)

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVE!!!! I hope you all have a great one! I probobaly will post tonite after everyone goes to sleep, so have a wonderful Christmas Eve & Day. ***MUH-WAH***

Merry Christmas guys!!! I know its not quite here yet, but I am deffinitly in the Christmas spirit. I was under a lot of stress until today when it all got better! :-). I still have 1 more thing to buy, and Charlie is going to get it for me tomorrow. Next Sunday is Tiffany's bridal shower. I am not quite ready. I still have to put the deposit down for the room and I still need to buy a little bit of food(Britney is bringing the rest), get some disposable cameras', buy some soda and maybe some bottled water for those people who don't like soda or the punch Britney is making. I really hope the shower goes well. I haven't gotten an RSVP from anyone "officially" but I know that so far 16 people are for sure coming. Tomorrow me and Amy are babysitting Nolan. He he he. I can't wait. Matt gave Rene' an early Christmas present and she is going to get her nails done and get a pedicure. Then Tuesday she's going to get highlights. :-). Gosh, I just love Christmas. I love all my family being together and all that stuff. Then is New Years...which I am not sure what I am doing. Charlie has to work that night, which is fine because he will easily make $500+ that night in tips. And, well, that is just wonderful. Even though it is my first new years being 21, I really think I will just stay home. That is totally cool with me though. I feel like an old lady sometimes because I really just enjoy being with Charlie and my family. I guess it just means Im happy and content in my life. Then after New Years, its Tiffany's wedding. I think she said today that it was like 13 days away. Isn't that crazy??? Tiffany will be married. I guess I still just see her as Charlie's little sister...not a grown woman capable of getting married. But she is. :-). I still have shoes to buy for the wedding and a bra and some panny hose. Anyway, I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas, I know I will. My whole family will be together and that makes me a very happy girl. :-). The post before this was something I recieved from someone. Its soooo true. I am not currently friends with many people I was friends with in the past, but thats okay because they were there for a specific reason. Most people don't stay in our life forever...though we mostly wish they would(atleast for a period of time). Ne-who. I'll probobaly post again soon. Also check out my webpage. I will add new pics and a few updates either tonite or tomorrow. ***MUH-WAH***

*In kindergarten your idea of a good friend was
the person who let you have the red crayon when all
that was left was the ugly black one.

*In first grade your idea of a good friend was the
person who went to the bathroom with you and held
your hand as you walked through the scary halls.

*In second grade your idea of a good friend was
he person who helped you stand up to the class
bully.

*In third grade your idea of a good friend was the
person who shared their lunch with you when you
forgot yours on the bus.

*In fourth grade your idea of a good friend was
the person who was willing to switch square dancing
partners in gym so you wouldn't have to be stuck
do-si-do-ing with Nasty Nick or Smelly Susan.

*In fifth grade your idea of a friend was the
person who saved a seat on the back of the bus for
you.

*In sixth grade your idea of a friend was the
person who went up to Nick or Susan, your new crush,
and asked them to dance with you, so that if they
said no you wouldn't have to be embarrassed.

*In seventh grade your idea of a friend was the
person who let you copy the social studies homework
from the night before that you had.

*In eighth grade your idea of a good friend was
the person who helped you pack up your stuffed
animals and old baseball but didn't laugh at you
when you finished and broke out into tears.

*In ninth grade your idea of a good friend was the
person who would go to a party thrown by a senior so
you wouldn't wind up being the only freshman there.

*In tenth grade your idea of a good friend was the
person who changed their schedule so you would have
lunch together

*In eleventh grade your idea of a good friend was
the person who gave you rides in their new car,
convinced your parents that you shouldn't be
grounded, consoled you when you broke up with Nick
or Susan, and found you a date to the prom.

*In twelfth grade your idea of a good friend was
the person who helped you pick out a
college/university, assured you that you would get
into that college/university, helped you deal with
your parents who were having a hard time adjusting
to the idea of letting you go...

*At graduation your idea of a good friend was the
person who was crying on the inside but managed the
biggest smile one could give as they congratulated
you.

*The summer after twelfth grade your idea of a
good friend was the person who helped you clean up
the bottles from that party, helped you sneak out of
the house when you just couldn't deal with your
parents, assured you that now that you and Nick or
you and Susan were back together, you could make it
through anything, helped you pack up for university
and just silently hugged you as you looked through
blurry eyes at 18 years of memories you were leaving
behind, and finally on those last days of childhood,
went out of their way to give you reassurance that
you would make it in college as well as you had
these past 18 years, and most importantly sent you
off to college knowing you were loved.

*Now, your idea of a good friend is still the
person who gives you the
better of the two choices, holds your hand when
you're scared, helps you fight off those who try to
take advantage of you, thinks of you at times when
you are not there, reminds you of what you have
forgotten, helps you put the past behind you but
understands when you need to hold on to it a little
longer, stays with you so that you have confidence,
goes out of their way to make time for you, helps
you clear up your mistakes, helps you deal with
ressure from others, smiles for you when they are
sad, helps you become a better person, and most
importantly loves you!

La la la. I know I just posted, but I am here sitting at work...its 8am and we are dead slow. Im bored as crap!!! LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA. UGH

Hey, I haven't posted lately...but there hasn't been much to post about. Life is going good. I have nothing to complain about. My family is awesome. Nolan just adds sooooooo much to our lives. He is the cutest little thing. Brady is handling being a big brother pretty well. He gets kinda jealous some times...but hes mostly okay with it. Rene' is awesome. You would never know by looking at her that she had a baby a little over a week ago. My parents rock. Charlie rocks! Everyone is great. I am really looking forward to Christmas Eve & day. For our family Christmas eve is the bigger event. This year EVERYONE will be at my parents house and we will have snacky food(yummy) and have a big 'ol time. We also open pretty much all of our presents then too. Then Christmas morning Charlie and I will go to his house and open presents there and then we will come back to my house and the family will all come out(actually most of them are spending the nite at my house) and we will be having fajitas. We normally do the traditional food on Christmas day, but this year Dad decided we needed a change. So we are having chicken, beef steak, and shrimp fajitas and all the trimmings. It should be really nice. I have sooooo many things to be thankful for this Christmas, and I hope you do also. I have the best boyfriend any girl could ask for, a family that is totally supportive and wonderful and a good job. Ya don't need more than that. :-) I hope you all have a great Christmas...and be thankful for what you got!!!

Well today was like whatever. I woke up, got dressed and went to work. The best part of my day was when I came home from work, my brother, rene' and Nolan were at my house. I held Nolan forever!!! He was absolutly adorable!!! I have to go to 1960 tomorrow to get some stuff for Tiff's wedding. Ne-who, I will write more tomorrow!!! Luv ya! ***muhwah***

***THIS POST WAS DELETED***

GUYS: let me just give you a big hint to help you out. If you ever need to by your wife, girlfriend, whatever a gift you only need to go to 1 store. Baliey, Banks and Biddle will take care of you. Bring home that little blue bag and you will have done good!!!

Well, I just got back from one of Tiffany's bridal showers. Some women from FBCM threw it for her. I didn't wanna go at all but Miss. Peggy(her mom) talked me into and said it would mean a lot to her and Tiffany. So, I sucked it up and went. It wasn't as bad as expected, but whatever. The thing is that one of the ladies who threw the shower invited(SOMEHOW) all the people that me and Britney invited to our shower. I was upset. I mean its like I am spending a lot of money and using a lot of my time and putting my heart into this shower and I don't know what the point is. Everyone was there today??? So I am thinking that there isn't a point of another shower. I dunno. I think I am just upset and all that jazz. There is other stuff going on with this situation but I don't wanna talk about any of it on here. Ne-way. I mean our shower is gunna be soooo fun and this shower was nice...but not fun. UGH. LA LA LA. Julie is just gunna keep her big fat mouth shut on this one. I'll just suck it up. Bye bye.

Check out the little website I made for Nolan.

My new nephew, NOLAN DAVID KIRBY, was born today(12/12/02) at 1:30pm weighing 5 pounds and 4 ounces and being 19 inches long. He is absolutly adorable. I just couldn't get over how handsome he was. Rene' is also doing very well. Me and Kami are going out to party hard tomorrow nite. I am kinda nervous. I can't say why...but I just am. la la la. I will have to get a new outfit.

Well, I just feel like total crap. I had 2 finals today and neither of them went well. Finals are sooooo horrible. They are way too powerful. I could fail like every one of my classes and it scares the crap out of me. What makes it worse is that I am sick as crap. Just ask Kam or Charlie. I tried to get in to see my doctor today but she couldn't fit me in till Thursday. Isn't that just great??? I got to see Tiffany's bridal pictures today and they are absolutly beautiful... :-). Just perfect. Well, I need to go Im on Charlie's computer and hes watching Oprah...LOL strange change of things???

You Should Be On The Real World!

Okay drama queen. Just point at camera at you,
and you'll do your thing. You've got what it takes to rule
on the Real World, but just don't kill your roomates!


What Reality TV Show Should You Be On? Click Here to Find Out!

***Im sick :'(...and it sucks a butt hole. There is so much I have to do this week from work to finals to sending out Tiff's invitations for the shower to buying everything else for the shower to working out and getting some sleep. I HAVE GOTTA FEEL BETTER ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!!***

I've been working out 1.5 hours a day for the past 3 weeks and I have lost over 12 pounds. Its great and I love it!!! Finals are this week and IM SICK. Its bad. I can't breathe and I just feel like duke. I have the whole hardly no voice, coughing up my lungs kinda thing. Sounds fun huh? Well, I need to go study. I have way to much to do. LUV YA!!!

KAMS BIRTHDAY IS IN A MONTH!!! YAY KAMI!!! Man, when I grow up I wanna be like Bethany. What an inspiration.

Well, hey. Its been forever since I've posted anything real. So, I guess I should catch up on what is going on in my life. Schools been going okay nothing to complain or brag about. My grades this semester aren't too gravy. They actually suck. I dunno what I will be getting in any class which is kinda scary. Thanksgiving was very nice. There were a bunch of us there though: me, Charlie, Amy, Dad, Howard, Muller, Gary, Cherylnne, Jessica, Sarah, Ryan, Grandpa and Wenche. It was at my Grandpas house on the ocean. Then we left that nite and went to Charlie's parents to spend some time with them and Tiffany and Paul. It was nice and funny. The only thing that sucked about Thanksgiving was that Matt, Renee and Brady weren't there. But, only because Renee' is too far along in her pregnancy to be traveling 2&1/2 hours + away. The baby is due on December 15, but they really think that it'll come a tad early. Its pretty much for sure going to be a boy and his name will be Nolan David Kirby. I just can't wait to see the little guy. Well, this was short but I need to do Christmas cards, I'll write more tonite!!!

Well, this isn't a post. just some more quiz results!!!

Welp, if I was a "Bond Girl" my name would be: Kissy Goodhead. Kams is: Maya G. Spot. Well. That was interesting. LMAO. Goodnite. I have a long post for tomorrow nite. News and what I am thankful for is coming soon!!!

Not too much is going on so I'll just take some more quizes to amuse you!!! he he. enjoy! :)

You Are A Romantic Kisser!

You'll only kiss if the mood is right and if you think you are falling in love.
Some may say you're old fashioned, but when you kiss, you see stars!
One kiss from you, and anyone will be hooked forever.

How Do *You* Kiss?

You Don't Need a Boob Job, But You Do Need a Boost

Push up bra. Ever heard of it? Girl, you sure can
give the illusion of being stacked. But in the end,
you're still on the small side. Consider surgery.

Do *You* Need a Boob Job? Click Here to Find Out!

Your Inner Blonde is Britney Spears

"Whee! I'm a virgin. Look at my butt crack!"
If everyone were as dumb as you, you'd be able to pull that one off.
But, you do get props for being one of the richest women around!
Who's *Your* Inner Dumb Blonde? Click Here to Find Out!

I took this quiz on the internet. It seems pretty accurate for me. I am very DEPENDANT and though I didn't know what Histrionic ment I am that also. So, take it and see if it fits your personality. Charlie took it though and I don't think it shows who he really is...strange huh? I'll post more tonite to let ya know what is going on with me!!! ***MUHWAH***

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Moderate
Schizoid:	Low
Schizotypal:	Low
Antisocial:	Low
Borderline:	Low
Histrionic:	High
Narcissistic:	Low
Avoidant:	Moderate
Dependent:	High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Moderate
-- Click Here To Take The Test --

HAY! I am in the computer lab waiting for my 2pm class to start. I really don't wanna go to it but Kam is making me! He he he. I took some really fun quizes today! Right Kam? I have to work tomorrow and thats no fun, but not bad either. Me and Kam found out that we don't have to work out for our class as much as we thought!!! YAY! Only 20 hours not 25!!! So, that will give us a little bit of a break, cause we thought we had to work out like every day for like 1/5 hours. Well, I don't have much to write about but I will write more tonite. We gotta go to dumb POLY. Then I have my BIO lab final. YEAH! *kiss kiss* oh yeah, check out BETH'S PAGE cause its awesome!!!

Well, Kam wrote in her diary saying she had a secret and that she couldn't even tell me. Well, Kam should know that she can't keep a secret from me. After a little talking she finially told me what the secret was. I think its a good thing. She also told me something that kinda eazed my mind. See, something happend last week and then she went back on it and I was thinking how dumb she was for doing it but now I know why she did it and though I think it sucks I understand. Well, I am going to go to sleep now. I'll write more tomorrow. LUV YA!!! *kiss kiss*

Well, I made like 3 quiz's the past few days and most people didn't do too good. I dunno if its that is because no one knows me or that my questions were really hard and really had 2 possible answers. Oh well. Im watching "Dirty Dancing" right now. It is such a good movie. One of my all time favorites. If you haven't seen it, you should rent it. I always wanted to be "BABY" and just dance, and date this HOT guy and rebel and blah blah blah. My favorite scene is the one where they are on the long dancing. Its soooo cute. Or maybe the water scene right after the log scene. Lol. Tonite I need to go run a few arrons like going to Wal-Mart, and possibly Target. Then I think we are eating dinner at my brother's house. I have a lot of school work to do this week, and that won't be fun. My bio lab final is Tuesday. Im gunna study hard for it tonite. I gotta make a good grade so I can pass the test. My webpage should be done soon, even though I said that a lot...it really is done, just not the pics. Maybe I should just put it up without the pictures. I dunno. If you have input on that let me know. I really wanna go shopping soon. I got paid Friday and its killing me not to spend some of it. :). My hair color is kinda fading...I really wanna get it redone but that would be way too much damage to my hair in a short time. So I made an apointment to get it redone on December 26 at like 5pm. That way it will look good for Tiffany's wedding. Speaking of the wedding I got the shower invitations the other day. I just hope Tiffany likes them. I think they may be more my style than hers. But her Mom said she would like them! I got to sleep in today and that was nice. I love to sleep. Its deffinitly one of my favorite things. Well, me and Kam's chat partener won't be on until Thursday. That sucks. UGH. Well, I am gunna go Kam is bugging me about finishing so she can read it before she gets off. I have a lot more to write so I will write more tonite. LUVYA! *muhwah*

TAKE MY COOL QUIZ #1!!!!
and then
TAKE MY COOL QUIZ #2!!!

Howdy. Howdy. Howdy. I am at school in the computer lab sitting next to Kam. Char is in the computer lab next to us with the biggest BITCH in the world. Sorry to use that word...but this girl is that!!! SHE IS THE DEVIL! Or maybe the ANTI-CHRIST. Ne-who. Not much is going on. I have pretty much been working or doing school stuff. Not too fun at all. BRB gotta go eat lunch w/KAM AND CHAR

Well, hay. Not too much new going on. I didn't get a lot of sleep last nite and I missed my first class this morning. UGH. But its okay. It was for a good reason. I am playing catch-up this week on all my assignments. Kinda sucks. NEVER PROCRASTINATE. So, this week won't be too fun, but its only my fault. UGH. Well, I need to go, a lot to do today. la la la la.

I had my meeting w/Avon and I am now a repersenitive. I figure I won't lose any money and maybe I can make a little more extra spending money!!! Let me know if you wanna see some of the books!!! *muhwah*

Man, I stayed up till 5am talking to people last night. That is just crazy. I think we all talked for like 6 or 7 hours. Isn't that crazy? Well, I gotta go get ready, I have a meeting with an Avon lady to start selling Avon. Hey, maybe I'll make some extra money for Christmas and me and Kams trip. Wouldn't that be nice??? Yes it would. I cannot stay up till 5am tonite. GOT IT GUYS? UGH! Good luck Beth, hope everything works out for you babe!!! And Tiffany, sorry we didn't get to see each other this weekend. UGH!OH YEAH- THE BANK IS CLOSED TOMORROW AND I GET PAID FOR DOING NOTHING SINCE IT IS A HOLIDAY!!!! HECK YEAH BABY!!! I'll post more tonite.
Kam- 1(lol)
Jason- 2
Julie- 0
Those are sad numbers!!! But, Kam knows the truth. Lol. Bye bye guys!!!

Tonite is not a good nite. I get my feelings hurt way too easily. I think it gets on Charlie's nerves. He normally isn't the cause of me getting my feelings hurt, but I gripe to him. Kam's mad at me and it KILLS me when Kam is mad at me. Ne-who. I am just gunna go to bed. Anyway. I hate it when people are mad at me in general. It makes me feel like total crap. Im gunna go to bed and watch the Ya Ya movie. So. blah. Goodnite, sleep tite and don't let the bed bugs bite. I am a very sensitive person. I take everything personally and to heart. Its a curse. Sorry that this post is all rambely. Its just jumping back and fourth to different subjects. Well, Kam sorry for whatever your mad at me at. Just e-mail me and we can chat tomorrow. I WANT TO GO OUT ANY DAY THIS WEEK. YOU TELL ME WHEN AND I WILL FIND SOMEWHERE WE CAN BOTH GET IN AT. K?

Hi-ya. Well, I didn't end up doing ANYTHING tonite. It really freaking sucked. I was supposed to do something with Kam, but we didn't end up doing anything. Kinda a big mess. My tummy hurts really bad. I dunno why. At work today our manager bought us pizza from this really yummy place, so maybe thats what its from. I dunno. I am not doing anything tonite. I really wanted to go out or out-out, but no go. Charlie is at home...he was going to go to Bar Houston with some friends, but since I didn't go out he didn't either. But, he didn't stay over at my house either. He was way tired, so I told him to go ahead and go home and get some sleep. Char's working pretty hard...so he needs his sleep. I was supposed to work tomorrow, but Im not. And that is very good news!!! I have this candle that I bought from Target and it is white and all glittery(SOOOOO PURRTYYYYYY) and it smells like peppermint and it is just soooooo goood smelling. I love it. Also, Charlie bought me this beautiful arangement of flowers for my birthday 2 weeks ago and they are still alive and BEAUTIFUL. Kinda strange huh? I have never had flowers last 2 weeks. Charlie bought me The Devine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood the other day so I think I may watch that tonite!!! Jingle Jam tickets go on sale tomorrow, but I don't know if Kam still wants to get tickets and go. I do. So, Kam, if you read this let me know if you wanna go or not. Ne-who. I don't know what the plans are for tomorrow nite. I know during the day I need to clean my room and car and was all my clothes and go to the mall...but I think tomorrow nite Charlie is going out, so I will probobaly stay at home AGAIN and watch movies. UGH!!! Being 21 hasn't been so great for me. Nothing has really changed. I haven't been out that much and partied or anything...I REALLY WANNA THOUGH. Well, I am gunna stay on the internet for a little while more and then go watch my movie. Have a ROCKIN night!!! muuuhhhhhhwwwwwaaaaahhhhhh!

Well, I said I would post tonite, so here I am. POST POST POST. Kam, Charlie and I went shopping and to the movies this afternoon. Well, Charlie tagged along for the shopping and saw a different movie than me and Kam...but still. Me and Kami saw "The Santa Clause 2," and Charlie saw, "I Spy." It was a very nice day. But, after the movie we all rushed to our houses' to watch the super-sized FRIENDS episode! It was very good. Freddy Prince Junior is very funny!!! HE IS JUST SOOOO SENSITIVE. LOL. Well, I am now just sitting at my desk talking to Jason. Hes such a nice guy and fun to talk to also. I have to work tomorrow and Saturday...ugh, but the brite side is that the bank is closed Monday for Veteren's Day. He he he. So, that'll be nice. =>. I think Kam and I are going out tomorrow nite. I am not sure where though. Should be fun no matter what we do. We normally always have fun!!! Ne-who I am going to get back to chit chatting. I'll probobaly post Saturday...maybe even tomorrow. It all depends on what I am doing. MUHWAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Well, I griped at Kam for not posting in her blog for a while, and well either have I. Things are going really great for me. I started my new job at Woodforest National Bank a few weeks ago and I love it. The people are great and its a very easy job. Once you learn how to do everything its great! One of the girls I work with is Jason Frederickson's brother's wife. So, that was nice kinda having some sort of person there that I had a common person we knew. Other than work, I am at school or at home or going out-out. School sucks. I really wonder why I am in school. I know I need an education so I will have a job and stuff. But I really think that if it wasn't for my parents that I would of dropped out by now. My dad is very insistant that I graduate, so for him I will. BUT...if it was up to me I would be gone. I just hate it. Im sick of going to class and listening to some dumb ass professor talk. BLAH BLAH BLAH. I wish I could just win the lottery(or marry a rich man) so I wouldn't have to worry about money. School is just HORRIBLE. Going to Sam makes it like 10X worse. I think that if I was going to a different school, maybe things would be different. I got accepted to A&M and I would *LOVE* to go there, but I won't leave Charlie, my friend(s), or my family. Especially since there is a new baby on the way. I just couldn't leave and be far away from the little guy. I know A&M isn't that far away, but its far enough. Well, I better go, cause I am in the Montgomery County library and have a day full of studying ahead of me. Charlie's here and Kam's almost here...so I'll write more tonite!!!

HAY! Well, I haven't posted in a while...so here is some updates. Ummm. Halloween was not eventful. I just handed out candy. Not too boring, but whatever. So then Friday I went to work and got off at like 6:15 and came home, shaved my legs and fixed my hair and got dressed to go out! I went to dinner w/Charlie at Chillis' and then met Kam. And us and Lindsey and Rachel all went out. It twas not much fun at first but we had some drinks and started having a little more fun. Then we left the club at around 1:45am(right before it closed) and went to Taco Cabana. AND OH MY FREAKING GOD!!!!!!!!!!! It was the most awesome thing in the world. I won't go into anymore detail because Charlie might be mad at me. But, screw it, I will. Basically, this guy walked in while we were eating and he was tall, and GORGEOUS. I mean it was breath taking. He was probobaly 6'3 with blond spikey hair, kinda tan(but natural, not tanning bed tan), blue eyes, firm body(not too skinny, but not huge muscles), wearing nice dress grey pants and a blue polo long sleve shirt, and he was about 24 maybe 25(the perfect age- not immature from college, but not too old). So, as you can tell he was nice to look at, VERY NICE. And we were all stairing at him the whole time he was in line and stuff. Then he sat down at a table not too far from us and he did the most wonderful thing. He ***PRAYED*** before he ate. So lets just remember this- hes GORGEOUS and he PRAYED. So he sat there and ate and we all just watched him and then when he left we walked out right behind him and the other two girls walked way around his car, but me and Kam walked right by it. And Kam ran her hand down the car and I just kinda walked really slow. And the most amazing thing happend. HE SMILED RIGHT AT ME and he did that head thing (like saying, whats up?) and just kept the most beautiful smile on his face right at me. Then we walked over to Lindsey's car and he pulled away. He was such a polite driver, he let this other car go in front of him. And he pulled out and was like on the road ahead of me and I stood on the curb and watched him pull away and he smiled at me and did the head thing again. So the whole way home, we were talking about him and basically describing our "perfect boy." It was really nice. I LUV YOU CHARLIE!!! Sorry for letting you know about that. *muh-wah* Newayz. And today I slept kinda late and then went to my sister-in-laws baby shower. After that all my family came back to my house and my dad cooked ribs, chicken and sauasage and Amy made potato salid. It was all yummy. And here I am now, letting you all in on everything. I am gunna finish watching some movies and enjoy sleeping in tomorrow. There are so many more details to the "perfect boy" story, but I won't post them here. Kami summed it up on her blog. LOL. Ne-who. Have a rockin nigh. *MUHWAH* XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Howdy, tonight was horrible. We had to register for next semester and I couldn't get into like 2 or 3 of my classes. SHSU can suck my big toe!!! Friday is gunna be soooooooooo much fun. I can't wait. The world better look out when Kam turns 21. We will be going out all the frickin time!!! Our boyfriends may not be to crazy about that, but thats their problem. => Work is going GREAT!!! I really like everyone who works there! They are all soooooo nice and helpful! I fought w/my parents tonight and that just sucks arse! I hate it so much. I just sat in my room in the dark and cried for like an hour afterwards. I really need to hurry and move into an apartment. It would help things so much. I love my parents so much, but they can make me soooo mad. I currently have the headache from HELL. I mean it is bad. I feel like my head is about to explode!!! Kam is waiting for me to write in this...so I am gunna take my TIME!!!! he he he. Well, tomorrow we have school and I have to go to all my classes. DOESN'T THAT SUCK AN ASS? I am still not sure what will happen tomorrow night. I have a feeling I will be staying at home DOING NOTHING. But, hopefully we can do something or someone will call me and be like, "hey julie, this is - - -, lets go do something fun!" ***RE, AD EVERYBODY READ!!! WHOO WHOO*** ***T-O-U-C-H, D...O-W-N!!!*** WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Well, I need to go go. I should be going to bed soon, but I think I'll probobaly be on a little bit longer tonight as long as Kam and Jason are still on. nitey nite. sleep tight. *muhwah*

Well, hello. Today has been an okay day. I got up late so I didn't get to wash my hair. I took a bath but my hair sucks. Its all nasty. But then I went to HED class and it sucked. We talked about HAND WASHING. Whatever. Then me, Kam and Charlie went and had some yummy chinese food and now we're in the computer lab trying to figure out all of our schedules. Not too fun. Then we will go to poly and then me and kam will go to bio lab. Oh what fun. I wanna go out!!! DANG IT!

HEY!!! Well, I will let you all in on what happend on my birthday! Well I had a pretty relaxed day and then Charlie picked me up and we went to the mall and he bought me a new outfit to wear out that night. Then we went over to Kam's house and waited for her to finish getting ready and I played with her adorable kitty Jinxy. Then we left and met Chris and went to Pappadeaux on Richmond & Kirby. Our waitress was so frickin dumb. It was like she was brandnew and scared of us. We ordered drinks(1 budlight, 1 bellini, and 1 pappadelicious) and she came back and said that the frozen drink machine was broken. Well, that just pissed us off. Then it took her forever to bring us the other drinks we ordered. The the food wasn't too good. But we gotover it and went on the way to Dave and Busters. We were worried cause Kam is under 21 and under-21 people are supposed to leave at like 11pm. Well, they asked us when we walked in if we were over 21 and we said yes and showed them our ID'S anyway and they looked at Kams and didn't realized she was under 21. So we walked in and went strait to the bar and Chris started a tab for us and ordered me and Kam bellini's and I think he drank beer(charlie didn't drink much cause he wanted to be fully aware of everythinng since he expected me to be completely trashed). And we sat and drank our first drinks at the bar and then ordered another round and went and started playing games. It was fun. Char and Chris went off and played some games while Kam and I got addicted to this horse game and then we would all meet up, get some more drinks and play some games together. Basically, it was a lot of fun!!! My 2 new favorite drinks are: Bellini's and Mudslides. I think that this was my finial drink count at the end of the night: 1 long island iced tea, 1 fuzzy navel, 1 mudslide(I WISH I HAD MORE, but we missed last call), and either 4 or 5 Belini's. Kam had about the same ammount of alcohol just different drinks. And the weird thing is that neither of us were drunk. I mean we drank a LOT but were not drunk at all. This morning I woke up and I felt just fine!!! Its nice to know I can hold my own. =>. Anyway, I had an awesome birthday when I get my pictures back next week(Im waiting to finish the roll this Friday when Kami and a bunch of others and I go out). Ne-way. Have an awesome birthday, and I hope that whenever your birthday is that it is as awesome as mine was!!! When I got home last night at like 2am I saw that Amy had made me cupcakes. They are sooooo yummy. I also got all my presents from my parents and Kami and I will post more about that later. I will write more tomorrow, but right now I am really tired. Nite nite.
***MUHWAH***

I HAD THE MOST AWESOME BIRTHDAY!!! I WILL POST MORE TOMORROW BUT I JUST WANTED TO LET YA KNOW THAT MY BIRTHDAY ROCKED!!!!!!

Well, it is officially my birthday!!! I couldn't be more excited. I AM FINIALLY 21 YEARS OLD!!!!. I am just exstatic. Tomorrow will be lots of fun too. Me and Charlie and Kami and Chris are all going to eat and then going out! It will be a lot of fun. I just wanted to say a little bit, cause I need to go. But I will write more Monday and let you know how my birthday went!!! LOVE YA!!!

ONLY 3 MORE DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HECK YEAH BABY! On a worse note, I am so sick of going to trainging. I mean its hard, but whatever. Some people there are annoying the HELL out of me. Well, I need to go go. Bye bye. Cya cya.

Things are rough. But when things get rough you show your true self. Im waiting for me to shine. I know I can. I have faith in myself. On a better note a some members of my family that I am not to close to and there is some tension and hard feelings ext...ext. They called to wish me a happy early birthday. Its kinda strange how something little can make you feel so happy. I had a total "aha" moment tonight. I won't go into detail, because its not something that needs to be shared. Personal things belong that way. My birthday is coming up this Sunday. The big 2-1. I have been looking forward to this day for a long time, but some of that excitement was lost tonight. Well, I should go. Its been a rough night and I need some sleep. Nite nite. Luv you bye.

IM HUNGRY!!! ugh. Well, gotta go me and Kam and Chazz are going to eat. There are tallibans in the room we are all in and Kam loves them!!!

He he he. Sorry. But I am freakin excited man. I mean come on you only get to be 21 once!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I am gunna have so much fun on my birthday. We are all going to Dave & Busters. Though I plan to drink and drink and drink, I can't get to trashed b/c I have to be at work the next day at 1:30pm. =>. I just can't wait to be 21, it almost doesn't seem real because I have been waiting for this FOREVER MAN! he he he. Well, I should go, I just wanted to pop in and say hi. Oh yeah. Me and Kam went and ate at Red Lobster(s) last night and she gave me an early birthday present. They are these little glitter clips(and some that are non glitter) for my hair. They are just what I wanted, so THANK YOU KAMI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And then my dad was soooo nice to me this morning. It was raining really hard, so he pulled my car into the garage so I wouldn't get wet!!! Thanks DAD!!! => I should go Im looking at trip stuff on the internet. Bye bye.

MY 21ST BIRTHDAY IS IN 5 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I AM SOOOO EXCITED!!!!